The Sky is Falling
by Average Hylian
Summary: POST SEASON 8: In the aftermath of angels falling from heaven, Sam, Dean and Castiel struggle to pick up the pieces of their lives. With Crowley escaped, Sam falling deathly ill, and Castiel trying to hold himself together without his grace, Dean tries to teach him the rituals of regular human beings, and the profound bond becomes even more so. (RP M content later on)
1. Chapter 1

The cool summer wind tossed Castiel's jacket, making it snap behind him from its force. His bright blue eyes were turned skyward... This wind wasn't normal. The angels were falling, and the earth itself was weeping with its winds as hundreds of angels burned through the skies, and crash landed into the ground all over the world. His throat was still sore from where his grace had been cut out, but that was the least of his worries... He'd done it again. He destroyed heaven. Sam and Dean hated him. And his brother's and sisters fell from grace because of him...

He'd thought he was doing something right... As Dean had once said, Castiel's intentions were always in the right place, but he fucked things up by not listening to his friend yet again... And now there was no way to bring things back to normal. Metatron had the angel tablet. They were all powerless. And it was too late to strike back...

Castiel fell to his knees. Water was leaking from his eyes, and he didn't know why. This had never happened to him before... The more he tried to wipe them away, the more they fell. A strange hiccup rose in his chest, and his Vessel's old memories supplied the word for what was happening... He was sobbing. Crying. Castiel was /crying/. And he couldn't stop... Watching the fireballs fall to the ground, the ex angel hunched forward and dug his nails into the earth, to feel the bite of sharp rocks burrow under his nail beds. He no longer cared that he was alone... He wanted to die here. He didn't want to be a human and live on with this guilt... Before he knew it, those sobs erupted into agonized screams. The pain overwhelmed him from the inside. Emotions he'd never felt before... It clawed at his insides and at his throat as he howled his lamentations to the sky. Nearby animals fled - a flutter of wings above him indicated birds panicking and flying away from the tortured creature beneath them...

Dean carried Sam bridal style in a panicked haze and when they looked to the sky Dean froze for a moment. Determined to get his brother safely to the impala, he continued on half watching his steps. When they had reached it, at the bottom of a hill, he rested Sam next to the door, lifted his chin in his hand and looked at his condition.. Sammy was dying... These trials were too much for him, and he was dying right in front of his Dean's eyes and Dean began to panic even more as Sam's lids were closing and Sam's body was slightly unresponsive. "SAM! C'mon Sammy... Please..." Dean shook his lightly, and Sam moaned. He was about to pick him up again to put him in the impala, but then they both heard a scream.. A blood curdling, murderous screech coming from the top of the hill. Maybe an angel had fallen there and he had survived the fall. Dean glanced up and back at Sammy. Sam looked at him and managed to mutter a muffled "go, Dean" his arm searched for the impala's handle. Dean hesitantly left Sam's side and ran part way up the hill, slowly gaining view if what the screaming was. He saw familiar hair and then a familiar trench coat... "CAS!" He screamed, he was alive!? But... What was he doing? He ran the rest of the way up and immediately fell to his knees next to Castiel, he felt his body convulsing under him and he didn't know what to do. "Cas?" He saw water streaming from his eyes and he could almost feel how Castiel's throat was getting hoarse by the sounds of his screams.

Castiel's screaming broke off into painful, choked sobs as he sank forward until his forehead pressed against the forest floor and dead leaves. He didn't even notice when Dean came over the rise of the hill, rushing toward him. He stayed put, curled on the ground and weeping... The sobs turned into hoarse croaks, and only after several minutes of choking on his own tears did Castiel lift his head again, eyes red and puffy as he watched what must have been the last angels fall away from heaven... Only then did he notice Dean near him. His expression completely lifeless, Cas pointed back from where the man came, every part of his body trembling. "G-go, Dean... I... I d-did this..." As another round of pain punched him hard in the chest, he gasped, and hunched over on himself again. He was weak and pathetic... Powerless. He couldn't help his boys anymore... Not that they would even want him around now.

Dean watched his angel break in his arms, he wanted so much to console him but Dean never knew how to Deal with other people's pain, but he cared immensely for Castiel, as often as he wouldn't admit it. He listened as Castiel ordered him to leave and he didn't even twitch away, "Cas...no... I'm not leaving you." He took Castiel into his arms, with a little resistance, and his own eyes began to sting. For his brother who was dying at the bottom of that hill and his angel becoming broken in front of him. "Cas, c'mon man, we need you... /I/ need you..." He pleaded

Cas's gaze hardened (as much as it possibly could, with tears pouring out of his face) when Dean pulled him into his arms, and he tried to shove him back but found himself to be more weak than he'd originally assumed. Dean didn't budge because his arms could hardly push. Staying on his knees, another shudder racked through him. He could hardly breathe anymore, and wasn't sure if he even wanted to. Trying to remain stubborn, he lifted a fist and hit Dean on the chest pathetically, hiccuping as he tried to get words out of his mouth. "Y-you don't understand... I-" he coughed, and hugged himself with his free arm to keep his body from falling to pieces. "You need an angel. I-I'm not... Not an angel... I'm /useless/, Dean..." Before he knew it, Castiel found himself crying again and leaning his forehead into the hunter's chest... He brought up his other hand, and wrapped it around Dean's upper back, fingertips clawing desperately into the man's jacket. "I did this... It's m-my /fault/... I-I thought I was doing something right..." The broken sobs picked up again, and his mouth fell open in a soundless scream as he held onto Dean... His throat was already raw, so no sound escaped him except for the hitches of his breath.

/not an angel? Useless?/ "Cas your family.." He felt Castiel burst again, "you're not useless, Cas... How could this be your fault? " he hadnt known about what Metatron had done or that he had tricked him. He held Castiel into the crook of his shoulder and chest, and held him tightly there as the now ex-angel was crying and hiccuping into it. He looked up again and the sight of falling angels, almost like fireworks... The sound of burning wings and Castiel's sobs. "Cas...i'm so sorry..." He held him together and pressed his face into his hair, pulling Cas into a cocoon of warmth, the ex-angels tears staining his shirt.

The graceless ex angel continued gripping onto Dean's jacket until his knuckles were white, and buried his face into him, weeping until nothing more could come from his eyes. His body was completely emptied of tears, even though he felt that he could keep crying for eternity. He wasn't finished mourning... Castiel couldn't speak again for a few minutes, even as he was finally /really/ registering Dean's warmth surrounding his body. He was trying to comfort Cas... Bless him, he really tried... And as much as he wanted to tell him how much he appreciated it, the only thing he could choke out afterward was how Metatron had tricked him. How he fell for it, almost without question... "D-Dean.." He shuddered, and curled into him helplessly. "/I'm/ so sorry... You should not be apologizing... P-please let me g-go, I will only h-hold you back... I cannot live with this guilt of everything I've /done/ to my home... I /cannot/-... Dean, I am a monster..."

Dean held Cas tighter. He wasn't sure what was making him react to the situation this way... But his angel was broken. His wings torn from his back and his grace leaked out... Cas was family... And family always came first. "Cas... I said no. I'm /not/ leaving you." He hugged him even tighter, much less to comfort him now and more to keep him from running away. His own tears streaked his face. He cried for his dying Sam and his broken Cas... He couldn't stand losing either, let alone both of them at once. "Cas please... You're /not/ a monster, and angel or not we /need/ you" he thought of other things in his head and "/i love you/ came to his mind for half a moment, but meant in a brotherly sense. He balled his fists in Castiel's jacket, and mustered up enough strength to try to bring them both to their feet.

Castiel continued to shiver, and only felt worse as he seen the tears streak down the hunter's face. Lip trembling, the ex angel pulled back just enough to wipe at the tears on Dean's face with the sleeve of his jacket. "Y-your face is - leaking..." He hiccupped, trying to deny the hunter's words... They couldn't possibly still want him around. Dean shouldn't care for him anymore... Not after all he had done. Nonetheless, he rose to his feet with him, legs weak and unsure. He ended up leaning most of his weight against his friend, but only for now... He knew that if Dean wouldn't leave /him/, he would have to leave Dean. Cas wouldn't allow himself to hurt them more than he had already... It would be cruel to them both.

When Cas wiped his face, his watery green eyes found his shattered sapphires, and Dean tried to convey a message of love, of need for Castiel... He wasn't sure if Cas could read him but nonetheless they stood. Dean walked with Cas's weight on him, trying desperately to show Cas how much he meant to him. If Sam died and Cas left him... Who knows what the elder Winchester might do... "Cas... Promise me you won't run away from us... Please man, Sammy is dying down there and i can't stand to lose either of you..." He choked on his swollen throat, even if Sam didn't die, he was unbearably attached to his now ex-angel. Hadn't they shared a 'profound bond'? "don't leave me". Even with his broken self, he supported Cas as much as he could all the way down to the impala.


	2. Chapter 2

Although Castiel was new to any form of love, he wasn't blind to it... He recognized it when he saw it in Dean's eyes, and a broken half-hearted smile pulled up on one corner of his mouth. Dean loved him like he loved Sam... And for the first time tonight, he felt it reach his heart... Their bond was singing to him, and it was convincing him to stay, if only for now. No one else was privy to this love from dean, and he would not squander it. Moving his feet one at a time, and trying to lean his weight off of Dean again, he walked with one arm around the hunter, still gripping the jacket fiercely. "I... I will not leave..." He owed him that much at least. "I wish I still had my power... I might have been able to help with something..." When they arrived to the impala, Sam was already curled up in the back seat, hugging himself and trembling. Concern shot over Cas's features. The side effects of the trials were accelerating at an alarming rate. "S-Sam-" he choked out, nearly tripping over his own feet even though Dean supported him. No, Sam couldn't die... He couldn't!

Dean helped Cas into the car, and then rushed to his brother's side, "SAM" he took Sam's sweaty face into his hands and attempted to get Sam to took at him. Through half-lidded eyes Sam could see a blurry Dean, "D-... Dean..." Sam croaked softly and harshly, barely escaping his lips. His head fell backwards and Dean brought a hand to the back of his head to help support it, Dean was now choking on his hears, tasting the salty liquid pass his lips. "S-Sam-my" he balled, he buried his head into sam's shoulder and let the tears flow from his face. His agony cried out inside his chest, looking up barely to look at Castiel, who was barely visible through his watery eyes, "Cas... Sam..."

Nearly falling into the seat, Castiel turned himself around in the front to peer back at Sam worriedly, reaching out to touch the younger Winchester's hand with his own. Sam took it and squeezed feebly, but he still couldn't find the strength to raise his head. They were all scared... Sam was just doing his best to try and hide it. "Dean," Cas spoke up softly, before half crawling through the seats to reach his hand out to him too. "Dean, i-it will be alright... Perhaps Sam needs rest. Doesn't that make humans feel better?" He squeezed Dean's shoulder, and squished himself a little closer to pull both his boys into an embrace. He'd only ever done so once before, but now they needed it. "I love you as I do my own brothers... Please do not lose faith in Sam..."

Dean sniffled and put a hard face on, to be brave for his Sammy, "we gotta bring him to a hospital" Dean thought that would probably be the best thing to do for Sam right now. Luckily, he had scoped the nearby area before and he knew exactly where the closest hospital was, bout 40 miles out, an there was no doubt Dean would make it more like 5 miles. He jumped in the driver's seat and revved baby to a start and he pushed the pedal and immediately began speeding, even Dean was a little scared he was going /too fast/, but Sam mattered so much more. He put a cap on his emotions, as he drove, and pulled into the parking lot of the hospital on the ER side. He didn't say anything to Cas, blind and deaf to everything until he knew Sam was safe. They got in right away, and as soon as Sam was on the hospital bed, the doctors all looked at each other with looks that Dean didnt like to see. "Can you help him?" His wall of bravery thinning.

Castiel pursed his lips and said nothing in response as Dean decided on bringing him to a hospital... As an angel, Sam's condition had been beyond what even /he/ could heal. As much as Castiel loved humans, and for as much faith as he had in them... He doubted they could do anything more than keep him comfortable. Perhaps what Sam had would pass on its own... Or it would kill him. Both options were teetering on the tip of a double edged blade - it could go either way. Sitting back in his seat properly as Dean drove, he had one hand held out behind him grabbing onto Sam's, and the other was holding Dean's arm. Cas just needed to feel them both for some unexplainable reason... Other than the sound of the roaring engine, the drive was silent until they arrived at the hospital. When they brought Sam in, the doctors did take him, promising Dean they would do their best to figure out what was wrong... Cas had to let go of Sam's hand, and the grip on Dean's jacket only tightened to a fist in response. Expression blank, he looked up at Dean as the doctors wheeled Sam away on a bed to the back room. They needed to wait until the doctor came back before they could see him again. "... Dean, I'm sorry..."

Dean clenched his eyes shut, wrinkles creasing his face, just for a moment before he turned to Castiel, who spoke with a voice thick with sorrow. "Cas.." He choked out, and the tears broke his surface. He leaned forward, grabbed Cas's had with his own, and let himself slump into Cas as he wept lightly. Sam wasn't dead, yet, therefore heavy tears were unnecessary as of yet, but nonetheless Dean clenched to his ex-angel.

Castiel bit his lip hard as he watched Dean beginning to break... Never had he seen so much emotion on the hunter's face, nor had he seen so many tears. He was in complete anguish, and there was nothing the ex angel could do to make it better. Nearly stumbling backward in surprise as the other leaned forward against him, Cas simply sighed, closing his eyes as he gave Dean's fingers a squeeze. There was no use telling him just how much he wished he could help - Dean already knew that. Ducking his forehead down on top of the hunter's shoulder, his free arm circled around his chest so his hand could rest between the other's shoulder blades to keep him near. "Sam can make it... If there is one thing humans have taught me, it is that the Winchester's do not go down easily... Nor do they /stay/ down."

Dean lifted his head slightly to weakly smile through his tears at Cas. He wiped one half of his face with the sleeve of his jacket. He heard the door to the waiting room open and a doctor staring at his clip-board came out and walked towards him. Dean turned from Cas to greet the doctor, "is he stable?". The doctor answered him with a blank face, "yes, but only for now. He seems to be having lots of spikes up an down. You may see him quickly, if you like, but visiting hours are over already so you can't stay here." The doctor matter-of-factly informed Dean. He needed to see Sam's face not riddled with pain, so he followed the doctor to Sam, and Sam lay unconscious, IV filled with morphine. He put a hand on his brothers chest, feeling him breathe, "oh Sammy.." He watched and listened to the heart monitor for a moment, everything seemed normal, right now. He looked at Cas again with a feeble smile.

Cas moved his head off of Dean's shoulder when the hunter looked up again, offering him a tender smile as he dabbed at the tears on the other side of Dean's face. He didn't look away from his eyes for even a moment, until the doctor returned to the room with an update. He could feel a weight lifted off his chest as they were told he was stable, even if it was just for now, and quickly followed after Dean to Sam's room. Seeing him so peacefully asleep on the bed put a half smile on Castiel's lips. Standing at the foot of the bed and watching as Dean perched beside him, he couldn't help but feel something tug at his heart... This love that the two boys shared was beyond anything Castiel had ever seen before. It put a sense of longing within him to watch. Stepping over to Sam's other side, he knelt beside the bed and laid two hands on Sam's forearm. Closing his eyes and lowering his head, Castiel did the only thing that he /could/ still do for Sam... He began to pray. He had no idea who or what would listen to a fallen angel's prayer, if anyone at all... But all Cas had left was hope, and this small, broken little family that had cared for him for so long. He didn't want to lose them.

Dean took his time staring into his brother's face, taking in the sight of him not in pain. He didnt move his hand away from his steady rising and falling chest, feeling him, whispering pleas. Dean wanted to pray, as he saw Cas doing so, but who would he be praying to? Metatron? No. He would rather go back to hell for his Sammy than pray to that bastard. However, he understood why Cas was trying, and he was grateful for him. The doctor walked in silently, and with a soft voice informed them politely that they needed to leave now. He reluctantly took his eyes off if Sam's face to look at Cas. He muttered a quick "okay" and held his hand out to the still kneeling man, "c'mon Cas, we gotta go"

Castiel hardly noticed when his prayer turned enochian, and the words he whispered grew softer. He kept it short and simple, hoping that god would hear his pleas and give Sam a chance at fighting this... He didn't realize he was crying again until the doctor came back, and Dean came over to hold his hand out to Castiel. With a sigh, he finished up his last few words, before raising his head and taking Dean's hand as he pulled himself to a stand. Using his other sleeve to wipe at his face, almost in embarrassment, he nodded. "At least Sam will rest easily here," he wouldn't recover overnight, though. It'd still take a few days or weeks for that.

Dean looked at Castiel softly, as he noticed the wetness on his cheeks. Tears for not only the ex-angels fallen brothers but for Sam. He wiped his chin with his thumb where a left over tear remained, and the walked out. Dean didn't notice that he hadn't let go of Castiel's hand, but he held it absent minded with thoughts of the evening still making his head spin. They walked to the Impala, waiting patiently, and he let his hand slip away as they went to opposing sides of the vehicle. Dean took a moment, rested his head on the top of the steering wheel, before starting her up. He looked at Cas again, "hotel?". He said more than asked, before pulling out of the parking space.


	3. Chapter 3

Castiel dropped his gaze when Dean swiped a tear from his chin, sighing as he let the other lead them out of the room... He was worried about his friend, but knew there was nothing they could do for him now except wait to see what happens. His hand was loosely holding Dean's as they walked out to the car; this gesture confused him, but he decided not to think much of it, if the hunter didn't pull away or say something about it first. Climbing into the car (silently a little delighted that he had the front seat now, and no one was /dying/ this time), he glanced at Dean and gave a nod. Yawning as they pulled away, his eyes widened with alarm at the automatic watering of his eyes. "Dean I-... I think I may require rest...?!"

Dean chuckled a little. "Welcome to being human! Sleep is one of my favourite things." Dean commented. He continue to laugh in his head as Castiel freaked out over a little fatigue. He let Cas have his moment, as he drove at speed limit down the dark road, not entirely sure where the next hotel was.

Beginning to shift a little uncomfortably in his seat, he tore his gaze away from Dean and looked out the window at the dark world rolling by. "... Sleep requires becoming unconscious. What if something happens while in sleep?" He didn't like the sound of sleeping. It took too many hours away from the day, and anything could happen in that period of unconsciousness. What would happen if Metatron attacked in their sleep? Or anything else? Castiel could barely defend himself at all without his powers. He couldn't even fly away, or save Dean if something came through their window... "I don't like sleep already," he grumbled under his breath, brows furrowing together. "... I miss my wings..."

Dean rolled his eyes, "you'll grow to like it. Its peaceful. Its not always easy, but it's nice." And he let the subject go. "You could get new ones!" He half-joked, and burst laughing as he pictured his innocent angel.. Ex-angel, get tattooed. Squirming and tears stinging his eyes, but then again, Cas might take it very well. Cas had taken quite a beating before, but he was an angel back then, able to heal himself. His human senses and needs seemed to be wearing on him quickly already. He wasn't really excited to sit out Cas's first sleep, but nonetheless he would, of course.

Castiel grumbled under his breath at the thought of sleeping, and that he really would /have/ to... But he trusted Dean was right about it. He wasn't really one to lie about those things anyway - and he really /did/ seem to enjoy his sleep, so maybe Cas would get used to it eventually. Hugging the jacket around himself, the ex angel nearly narrowed his eyes at Dean. His wings were irreplaceable - how would one get new wings? "New ones? What do you mean?"

Dean flashed him a smile, "well i was thinking earlier that now your human youre gonna need onna these too," he flashed his anti-possession tattoo, "and you could get it in the centre of your back, and get wings with it..." He blushed a little, to his confusion, but he saw a picture in his head of Cas's strong back covered in wispy lines of ink. He looked back at the road seriously, hiding his strange demeanor. "I dont know man, it's just an idea" he putted out.

"Oh..." Blinking at the antipossession tattoo, he felt his shoulders slump a little more... That's right, he was human now. Open to possession by a demon... That was a strange concept. "I think I'd like that. I... Really would," he told him in a soft voice. If he couldn't have his real wings, he'd have something else to remember them by. Something that would become just as much a part of him. "Thank you, Dean."

Dean smiled proudly of himself. "I actually know a pretty good guy who'll do it for half price, especially when he finds out what you were, hell he might even do it free". Dean thought for a moment. He wanted to get something, too, maybe for Sam maybe for Cas or Bobby... Something to represent everything he loved. He sighed as he let the thought slip from him for now. He saw a light "_OT_L" he slumped. Another shitty hotel. Nonetheless he turned in, he was ready to pass out almost right away. He prepaid the desk lady, and took the keys. He lead Castiel to their room, first floor. As soon as he entered the room he threw his stuff down and plopped on the hard bed. "Home sweet home" he muttered almost inaudibly.

Rubbing his eyes a little, trying to get rid of his grogginess, Cas nodded again. He didn't really want to share what he was (or rather, what he used to be) with anyone else, but he would if that meant costing Dean less money. When they pulled up in front of the hotel, Cas stayed in the car to think for a little while longer, until he seen the man coming back with the keys to their room in hand. Climbing out and following him in, the first thing he did was sit on the edge of his bed, and rest his hands on top of his knees awkwardly. "... How do you engage in sleep?"

Dean let a sigh escape him as he opened his eyes tiredly, but did not move. "Lay down, close your eyes, and shut up" he muttered from his pillow. He could've been a little more gentle about it but he needed his mind to be blank, needed the unconsciousness. He turned over to watch Cas try to lay comfortably.

Staring at him and trying to observe just what it was that made human's get comfortable enough to sleep, Castiel started removing some clothes until he was only left in his t-shirt and boxer briefs, before mimicking the other and crawling up under the blankets. He curled on his side, facing Dean, and made his first attempt at closing his eyes to sleep. "... Dean?" He began softly, his eyes still closed. "What if something happens while we're sleeping?"

Dean hadn't taken his eyes off of Castiel, as he dressed down and lay in his bed. He rolled his eyes "it wont, and youre supposed to relax dude," he closed his eyes finally. He was sure nothing would happen, after what Cas had said that Metatron said to him.

Tugging the blankets up around his neck, curling into his pillows, Castiel sighed and tried relaxing as best he could. He was still nervous about sleep, but his body was extremely tired, and his head was cloudy too. "... Good night, Dean," He stayed still with his eyes closed, and eventually his breathing deepened and became more relaxed. He still felt Dean watching over him, and that was a balm for his nerves too. Before he knew it, a peaceful expression came across his face as sleep overtook him, jaw going slack and drooling onto the pillow.

Dean gave a last smile before he , too, let his body become slack and he drifted into sleep. Luckily, Dean had stopped dreaming a long time ago, so he can actually rest, and no doubt he was sleeping in tomorrow. He put his arms under the pillow to fluff it and hug it around his head.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean woke a little groggily in the morning. Facing the opposite way he'd fallen asleep, he half turned his body, "Cas?" He said with his sleepy voice, and when he didn't see him in he bed he sat up, "Cas?"

Castiel was confused in the morning when he woke up. He didn't even remember the moment he'd fallen asleep, but he just... Did. Opening his eyes, he spied Dean still sleeping peacefully across from him. He blinked slowly, taking in the hunter's peaceful features... His favourite pas time as an angel was watching Dean sleep... It was the only time his hard mask wasn't in place, and the only time Dean appeared soft and gentle. At least as a human, he could still enjoy this small comfort of a sleeping Dean. He wanted to lay there for a while longer to watch him, but found certain bodily urges were prompting him out of bed. His bladder needed to be emptied. Rising up out of the blankets as silently as he could, he padded over to the bathroom. At least he knew how /these/ bodily functions worked without a problem. Once relieved, he washed his hands in the sink, and looked up at himself in the mirror... It was only now that the reality of his situation began to set in. He was alone in his head, now... It was just Castiel. Jimmy Novak was no longer there... This body was /his/. And it would be his until the day he died as a mortal... Somehow, this thought made him smile. It was a grim smile... At least he would be able to grow old with Sam and Dean. He would die /with/ them, opposed to outliving them for countless centuries... They were his only friends, and now he was allowed that honour. He was allowed to be human, with no judgement from heaven... "Yes Dean," he called over his shoulder, his smile taking on a bit of life. "I am in the bathroom." Turning back to the mirror, and running a hand over his cheek, he sighed and closed his eyes. /This/ was home now. And this body was /Castiel/, and Castiel alone.

Dean sighed as he knew he hadn't run off from him. He got up to stretch, letting his tummy show, and he smacked his lips as he searched for his pants that /were/ on the floor in a heap, but now apparently had folded themselves nicely on his night table. "Cas did you... /fold my pants/?" He asked in bewilderment. Why? When Cas came back into the room still pantless as well, the look on his face was something Dean couldn't put a name to, but it seemed he'd been deep in thought. "Dude, are you okay?"

Castiel came back into the room, pursing his lips a little in embarrassment as he paused by the table with Dean's clothes folded atop it. "... Y-yes, I did. My apologies," he said, lifting all of Dean's things from the table and placing them on the foot of the man's bed for him to reach. Taking his own things to his bed, he sat on the edge and kept his eyes trained on his feet as he began pulling on his pants. "I am fine, Dean... I've had an epiphany. And have simply come to terms with what I am now... Human. This isn't Jimmy's body anymore, it's... Me. Castiel... It is only me now..." He was still depressed that he was no longer an angel of course, but at least he found being a human was now a little more bearable. Almost acceptable. And he wasn't going to fight it... He'd keep on living. For Dean... And for Sam.

Dean shook his head as Cas apologized for folding his clothes... It had just been that no one really ever got to teach him how nor had he ever needed to. He glued his eyes to Castiel as he spoke, /his own body/. Yes... It was true, his skin was no longer a simple vessel for him, but now who he was. He smiled at the other human with him, and he felt another tug at his heart, but he dressed quickly. "So, human. Hungry?" He felt his tummy rumble loudly and he rubbed it, "me too" he muttered at himself.

Doing up his pants and putting on his suit and tie, the ex angel eyed his trench coat for a long moment. He took it up in his hands, thumbing the material before closing his eyes and letting out a sigh as he placed it back down on the bed. No, he wouldn't wear it today... "Yes. Can we... Have burgers? I really like burgers Dean," he yawned again, before shaking his head and rubbing his eyes.

"For breakfast?" Dean laughed. "Sure, man, eat whatever you want." Dean gathered his wallet and headed out the door. He walked passed the Impala, to Castiel's confusion, "the diner is a block away, besides, walking wont kill us." Dean said. He couldn't quite identify his own mood, but it didn't really matter. They sat at the table nearest the door, and Dean quickly ordered a black coffee, eggs with bacon, and a side of bacon. He looked to Castiel indicating his turn

Castiel fought the urge to frown at Dean's laughing. He didn't know what was so funny about requesting burgers for breakfast. It was food, just like anything else, but he figured it was another strange human custom that he'd have to get used to, even though he didn't understand the difference right now. Heading outside after the hunter as Dean led the way, his brows furrowed in confusion as they left the car behind. Dean's explanation rang another small memory in the back of his head... Something about the angels getting flabby if they didn't start walking more. Would he get 'flabby' if he didn't walk around as a human now? Huffing, he stayed at Dean's side as the man led him to the diner, and sat in the seat directly across from him. He listened to Dean's order before making his own, asking for an espresso and a bacon burger (solely because Dean had bacon in his order) with fries. "This... Is an acceptable breakfast, yes?" He asked both Dean and the waitress with concern, but she only giggled and assured him that he could have whatever he liked. Seemingly satisfied with the answer, he sat back in his seat with an almost smug expression.

Dean placed one elbow on the table and rested his chin on his hand, looking at Cas. Their drinks arrived almost immediately, but Dean wasn't in a hurry to drink his coffee. Before Castiel took a swig of his own, "espresso, huh?" He waited for Cas to look back at him. "You what that stuff does to you, don't you? Think you're ready?" Dean hated espresso. It was way to bitter and too small. It did its job, but it was one of the most horrendous drinks along side americanos in Deans opinion. He took his other hand, not supporting his head, and took a drink of his coffee, letting the hot liquid trickle down his esophagus, and once it warmed his tummy he hummed contently.

As the espresso was placed on the table before him, Castiel looked down at it and licked his lips. "... I've developed a bit of a taste for it," he admitted, before blinking up at Dean. He had no idea what he was talking about - did coffee affect people? He never felt any different drinking it as an angel... Shrugging, he lifted the hot drink to his mouth and sipped, not minding the bitter flavour. Setting it down and wrapping both hands around it to warm himself, he stared across the table at Dean silently, watching his expression. He looked... Surprisingly calm. Almost like the face he wore when he slept; tender, perhaps? Soon their food was brought to them, and Castiel's eyes lit up eagerly at the sight of his burger. Thanking the waitress, he set his espresso off to the side before lifting the burger off his plate with a smile. "These still make me so... Happy..."

Dean ate his bacon strip by strip, not seeming to be able to take his eyes off of Cas. He shoveled his egg in quickly, as he wasn't that into eggs, but they always gave him a little energy. Drank most of his coffee while glancing over the rim over to the hungry human across him. Despite the wolfish shoving that burger in his face like there would never be another burger, Cas looked ... Cute when he ate. His already round cheeks puffed out and his jaw moving, searing into the meat and some of the sauce dripping on his chin. Dean let out a fairly loud laugh as a chunk of mayo slowly slid down his face, "du-dude... There's .. " he ceased his laughing for a mere moment to grab a napkin and rub Cas's face clean.

Castiel stuffed the burger in his mouth with a content hum. He loved the delicious meaty taste of the patty and bacon, not caring that the various greases were dripping inelegantly down his chin. Closing his eyes, the ex angel seemed in a state of pure ecstasy while devouring his meal. He didn't stop trying to bite into it until his cheeks were bulging sorely and he couldn't take in anymore. "Mmmff~" He sighed, chewing and swallowing, savoring his food as it went down. Cas didn't even realize Dean was watching him until he heard a laugh, and he immediately lowered the burger from his mouth, swallowing down what was left in his mouth before staring up in surprise at him. Blinking in embarrassment, his eyes followed Dean's hand and watched as the napkin dabbed at his face. Clearing his throat, he paused entirely as a bit of colour rose to his cheeks. He seemed confused as he felt the heat in his face, but didn't comment on it. "Erm... Thank you, Dean..." He uttered softly, before putting the half eaten burger down on the plate and fingering a little more slowly at his fries.

Dean was distracted by the color dancing on Castiel's cheeks, he almost didnt hear him mutter his thanks. He noticed, however, that he started picking at his food slowly. He watched him closely, just observing his features. He noted internally that his face looked a tad bit softer, more gentle... Maybe he was too burdened with his lost brothers. He decided to let the thought pass him as he sipped the last bit of his black coffee not taking the offer of the refill. He looked to Cas, who was still fingering around with his food, "hey are you alright?"

Castiel lifted a fry to his lips before blinking at Dean again. "I'm... Fine," He said, before rubbing his chin where the hunter had wiped off the mayo. He couldn't help but notice now, the way that Dean was watching him, with a tender expression he'd only ever seen while the man slept. It was extremely unusual to see it while he was awake, and directed at Castiel of all people. Nibbling at the fry, he hummed again as the salts touched his tongue. He loved this food, so much... "Mmm, you should really try these."

Dean was suspicious of Cas but he let him be. Dean smiled, "okay" he said simply as he opened his mouth but didnt move, wordlessly asking Castiel to feed him. He waited patiently, a little smug, ignoring the looks from others.

Swallowing down his fry, he stared at Dean's open mouth blankly for a moment. At first he didn't understand what he was doing, but he picked up a fry again and held it in between them. Leaning forward a little, he reached the fry over to rest it on Dean's tongue gingerly. Swallowing dryly, he half wondered if this was what Dean wanted him to do. Was this normal human behavior, feeding each other like this?

Dean closed his mouth around the fry and chewed it slowly, examining the taste. Cas was right, "hmmm" he hummed as the savoury food slid down his throat. "You about done?" Dean gestured at Cas's food. Dean didnt mind much, taking their time, considering they hadnt much to do... Which made him slump. But then he got an idea. He sat up quickly and beamed excitedly like a child. He remembered Castiel never git any of his movie references. "Cas i'm gonna educate you on pop culture!" Movies, bed, and junk food all day? Hell yes!

As Dean ate the fry, Castiel lowered his hand back to the table, and watched completely transfixed as he chewed. He was rather happy that Dean seemed to like it just as much as he did, and a lopsided smile tugged up one corner of his mouth. He nearly forgot about his burger and the rest of his fries until the hunter brought his attention back to it. "I- uh... I wish to take it back with us. It seems I can't eat as much now, as I could when I was an angel..." The half smile disappeared again, before he drank back the rest of his espresso. That, he wouldn't be taking back with them, but he knew he'd want to finish his food later. "... Pop culture?"


	5. Chapter 5

The area around Deans eyes creased greatly as a huge grin crossed his features, "you'll figure it out" he smiled at Cas again before waving their server over to request a to-go box. When she brought it back she brought their bill as well. While Cas places his food in the container, Dean counted the cash and left a generous tip. He slid out from the table and once he stood, gave another tummy exposing stretch into the air. Much relieved of his stiffening joints they began to walk back to the motel. Luckily, the motel had it's own mini video rent store, and as he let Cas wait in their room, he grabbed a good collection of some old westerns, some old action movies, and he was ecstatic to be holding all three Back-To-The-Future's in his arms. He came back juggling the movies and set them beside the old tv and vcr. The first he put in was Blazing Saddles, he plopped himself beside Cas on the same bed, to make it easier to share snacks. "Man, are you ready for the best time you'll ever have as a human?" He bounced

The ex angel frowned suspiciously. He didn't like that mischievous grin and those words together. Knowing Dean, this could turn out very disastrous, like the den of iniquity incident. Packing his food neatly into the box, he turned his gaze to Dean as he stood up, watching the edge of his shirt as it rose up over his belly. Immediately his mouth went dry and the heat rose up in his cheeks, but turned away quickly enough to not get noticed. Once the waitress was paid, he followed Dean out the door and carried his box carefully in front of him with both hands, keeping an eye on it as they walked, as if it would run away or get stolen if he didn't. When they arrived back at the hotel, he put his food into the mini fridge as Dean picked out the movie for them to watch. Sitting up on the bed with his back pressed against the headboard comfortably, he pulled his trench coat over himself and began to fidget in his seat uncontrollably. He suddenly felt very energized, and wanted to move about, but if this was what dean wanted him to do, he'd stay put and watch the films with him. "Yes Dean," he answered, a little more enthusiastic than normal.

The twin bed was a little cramped for space, they were slightly pressed together, and he could feel Cas squirming under him. Almost vibrating, actually, but he chose to ignore it and lay into his side, tucking his head into Cas's inner elbow like a pillow. Crissing his arms lazily the movie began playing, and every other line, Dean would quote it dramatically. About halfway through the movie, Dean was getting concerned for the vibrating ex-angel. "Man i warned you about that espresso." Dean stated.

Castiel stayed put as Dean rested his head in the bend of his elbow, trying to keep still so he wouldn't jostle the man... But found himself failing miserably. There was an unfamiliar energy pulsing through his veins, and even though he kept focus on the movie, his limbs were screaming /gogogogogogogogo/. Biting the inside of his lip, he began fidgeting with his hands and feet, before jumping a little at the sound of Dean's voice. "What-?!" His voice squeaked, before returning to normal. "I-I'm fine, Dean, I just- /WHAT ARE THEY DOING/?!" As if a lid had suddenly been popped off inside Castiel's head, he lurched forward on the bed and threw his arms up in the direction of the television.

Dean's eyes grew wide as Cas yelled at the television, "dude calm down, it's okay" he tried to bring Cas back to his original seating position by tugging on his shoulders, "just chill out". Dean wasn't sure he was going to enjoy this as much as he thought he would, with his ex-angel cracked up on caffeine. He stuffed some snacks in Castiel's face, "eat, chew with a vengeance" he ordered. He would offer to do exercise but Dean remembered when Sam used to be really into being fit and running, and his sweaty face and how uncomfortable he looked.

Now steaming full of energy, he barely felt Dean's hands tugging him back, until he dropped back against the headboard with a pout. Crossing his arms, he began swinging his feet at the foot of the bed, until the snacks were shoved in front of him. Eyes lighting up immediately, he hugged the bowl into his chest and began stuffing his mouth. "Mmf... Diss is sho guud... Wuv diss movie."

Dean cocked an eyebrow up at Cas, what a child he was. Cute, almost. He laughed, "yeah, she's a classic. Next one i think you'll really like." He got up when the credits rolled and ejected the movie, and replaced it with Brave Heart. He came back to the beds. But he moved the night table separating the beds, and pushed the beds together to create a bit more space for two males and the snacks.

Cas stayed in his spot, watching Dean arrange the room and push their beds together. Hugging the bowl of popcorn to his chest, he adjusted his pillows to move a little closer to the middle. He liked being close to Dean... It was a new human thing for him, to enjoy contact of any sort. He thought he liked it before, but now... Now he realized just how much he was missing. Human's were meant to /feel/ and touch and taste... Angel's were just created to be their father's soldiers.

Dean let Cas crawl closer to him, he found he quite liked having Cas near. As angel or a human, however... He thought he noticed that Cas was a bit warmer than he used to be... He felt heat almost radiate off him, and he snuggled slightly closer to him in the cold motel room.

Their shoulder's almost touching, Castiel shrank down to Dean's level on the bed, finding it more comfortable to be laying down and watching the film, despite his bubbling energy. Perhaps after he'd ask Dean if they could go for a run. He doubted he'd be able to sit still for another movie after this. Stuffing his mouth full of popcorn, he laid his head down on the pillow beneath Dean's shoulder, scooting a little closer to his warmth.

A light sting if heat coloured his cheeks, and he stretched again. Instead of bringing both arms to himself, he let his right arm clasp around Castiel's shoulders, and pulled him tight to his body. Smiling to himself, he watched the movie while most of his attention was at the warm body next to him. He rubbed his thumb against the material on Cas's arm and tilted his head towards Cas as well, hair brushing hair for a moment as the phone rang in his pocket abruptly. It was Sam. Normally he would think "cockblock" but it was his Sammy. He flipped it open quickly, "Sam?! Are you okay?"

Sighing as Dean's arm curled over his shoulders, he instinctively tilted his head to rest softly against the other's. If Dean was alright with this contact, that meant it was good, right? He found himself watching Dean a little more than he was watching the movie, and all he could really focus on was the touch of Dean's fingers on the sleeve of his shirt. Opening his mouth as if to say something, he shut it quickly as the phone rang and Sam spoke on the other end.


	6. Chapter 6

Lying in his hospital bed with a hand on his forehead to help block the light from his eyes, and the other on the phone, Sam sighed in relief when he heard Dean's voice answer. "Ugh... Yeah, hi Dean. 'M alright I think... I kinda feel... Awesome," he chuckled, smiling into the receiver. "Good to hear your voice... How're things...? How's Cas? Is he... Still with us?"

"Is that the morphine or you talking?" Dean turned his head to look at Cas, "yea he's fine, sittin' right next to me, actually. " he smiled at him, still nestled next to each other, "you're resting, aren't you?" He more demanded than asked, sternly

"'s me, stupid..." He grumbled to him, and letting his head drop back against the pillow. Closing his eyes, Sam huffed. "Yeah, I /am/. Ill be lucky if the doctors even lemme stand up in the next week... They said 'm lucky to be awake at all, isn't that crazy...? Thought I was gonna be in a coma!" He laughed a little at that, before shaking his head. "Oh, keep your hands off the virgin by the way. I know how you are when you get time wit'out me... But tell 'im I say hi, alright? When my drugs wear off I wanna see you guys..."

Castiel was finally beginning to feel a bit /too/ restless after a few minutes, so he reluctantly sat up, pulling out from under Dean's arm to sit on the edge of the bed. Without realizing exactly what he was doing, he began to bob his head a little, enjoying the feel of the bounce. The springs of the mattress began to creak as the rest of his body joined in, and he grinned joyfully at the bouncing. "Dean! This is- fun!"

"You got it man, the /virgin/ here is so cracked up in caffeine he might end up breaking something." He sighed heavily as he closed his phone. Time to let the rabid animal run free. He squeezed the bridge of his nose with his index finer and thumb. "Cas..." He turned off the television, "c'mon, were going to visit Sam." He opened the door for the puppy wagging his tail impatiently.

Frowning as Dean turned off the Tv, he shot him a look until he seen him heading toward the door. He stopped his bouncing and rose up to his feet, nearly stumbling over from his suppressed energy. "Sam!" He breathed excitedly, before rushing to the door and sweeping up his trench coat on the way out. Walking with large strides, he exited the door with a bright expression. "We're going right now?" He spoke in a rushed voice. "I hope he is doing well. Maybe he can come home soon. I hope it's all over so we can all start-" he began slowing down again, the brightness of his expression fading down a bit. "-... Working on getting my brothers and sisters home..."

Dean gave Cas a small tap on his butt to get him to stop thinking that way. "C'mon man don't do that to yourself now. Sam needs us" he ordered /nicely/. He didnt want to push Cas but he couldn't have him depressed like that, not right now. Even though he was much relieved to know Sam was okay, he couldn't much bear to see Cas's face wet with his own tears again. He let the ex-angel skip like a hyper child, and he followed him half-speed.

The tap on his rear made Castiel yelp, and jump forward in surprise. Turning to look at him wide eyed, the ex angel huffed and nodded with acknowledgement... No, he wouldn't ruin Sam's evening by being miserable, no matter how depressed he was. Dean had taught Cas to lie, and for Sam, he would lie to make him feel better. Jogging down the street after Dean started leading the way, he paused after a while to check back over his shoulder. Dean had fallen far behind. "Dean! Keep up! You warned me once about becoming 'flabby'..." He began jogging back toward him, the jacket flapping behind him in the breeze. The energy in him was coursing through every part of his body, even through his mind making him feel hardly anything like himself. He didn't mind it though - the caffeine high made him just as happy as eating burgers.

Dean lifted his head as he heard Castiels steps becoming louder again and saw him running back towards him. "By all means, run your heart out, but i'll continue walking as I may" he said blankly. He didn't want to damper any ones mood but until he saw Sam he would be a little mopy. "I'll walk a little faster, but you can go all the way to the end of each block and run back to me and do it again, burn yourself out or you'll never get to sleep, later" he informed Cas once before of sleep deprivation and how it 'really sucks'. He kicked little rocks here and there as Cas bounced around the side walk like a little girl who wanted to be a ballerina. He cracked a soft smile at Castiel's shenanigans, he loved seeing him so carelessly happy, even just for the moment, but he wasn't so sure about letting Cas have espresso again for a while. Finally they made it to the hospital, and used the stairs to Sam's room which was two floors up. The doctors were just leaving his room after examining his condition, and Dean simply leaned on the door frame as Cas bounced in happily at Sam.

Though he was a little disappointed that Dean wouldn't join him running, he simply nodded and kept going, grinning broadly. He hoped to have all of this energy burned out of him before going to bed... And despite Dean's painfully slow pace, they actually made it to the hospital in record time considering they were on foot. With all of Castiel's running back and forth, he was actually panting heavily when the hunter caught up to him, and the ex angel leaned against a wall to catch his breath again. Going inside, his limbs were a little sluggish even though his mind was still sharp, but they regained their vigour upon seeing Sam. Rushing into the room uncharacteristically, he took his spot beside the younger Winchester, and nearly threw himself across the man to embrace him - but he held back from doing so. Instead of being careless enough to accidentally hurt him, Cas chose to take his hand instead and give it a reassuring squeeze. Sam didn't look any better from the day before. In fact, he almost looked worse... But he didn't seem to be in any pain from the way he smiled when the two men entered.

The smile on Sam's face put an ease to Dean's heart, even though he could see his body was crumpling. He entered and sat on the bed beside Sam and put his hand back on his chest to feel his breathing, which was extremely shallow, and he looked into his brother eyes, conveying messages to him with out much verbal communication. Then he cracked a smile ," see, i told you he's cracked up, i tried to warn him" he gave Castiel a quick look and then returned his gaze to Sam.

"I am perfectly fine, /Dean/," Castiel tried to fight back a smile, but found that he couldn't. He was simply too delighted to be with /both/ his friends again, and that was likely the caffeine that made him that way. "Not cracked up."

Sam wheezed out a laugh at Castiel's hyper behaviour, squeezing the ex angel's fingers in return as he let his other hand come up to his chest to rest feebly over Dean's. He hadn't been feeling so well since waking up, and with the exchanging looks the two brother's had, he knew Dean was aware of it too. "Cute," he answered in a hoarse voice. "Hyperactive angel or not, 'm glad to see you guys. My head's pounding, but the docs are sayin' I'm still stable..." Teetering on the edge maybe, but stable. "'M sorry I'm stuck in here... Hope you guys aren't too bored stuck out there waiting for me to get better."

Dean couldn't keep himself from smiling, despite Sam's pain, he was still capable of putting a smile on his face. "We're glad to see you too, with your eyes open and heart beating." He knew Sam barely met the definition of stable but he would take it.. Let it pull him through. "And I'm educating him on all the references he never understood." He said proudly. Dean loved his movies. "And anyway, we'll be visiting you when we can." He let his brother have another smile from him.

"Yeah, uh... It's still beating. Doctors can't figure out what's wrong with me, but... With whatever the trials are doing to me, guess its only to be expected, right?" He relaxed further into the hospital bed, knowing that the other two were next to him. He was comforted having them near... Especially because he knew that Dean didn't hate him for what he'd done. "Sounds like fun, you two. How's the educating going?"

"Dean has played Blazing Saddles and Braveheart for me," Castiel told him. "Next we are going to watch the Lion King. I think we are making progress."

Dean smirked at Sam as Castiel spoke excitedly, "yeah see, he likes it." He changed the smirk to a soft smile as he looked back to the pain Sam was obviously in, trying to convey hope versus nothingness. He patted him lightly on his left pec, "well we came, we saw, but the docs wanna get back to examining you, so they're kicking us out." He informed Sam reluctantly. He heard the doctor clear his throat behind him by the doorway. "Well Sammy... Call whenever you can. Cas, c'mon, let's go." He ordered almost as if Castiel was a literal puppy. Though he seemed to be calming down a little bit. Hopefully, when they got back he'd be drained, and they could actually watch one of Dean's personal Disney favourites.

Before Dean could remove his hand from his chest, Sam's face went solemn and serious, reaching up to grab onto his brother's wrist. Tugging him back so Dean would remain in ear shot, Sam weakly lifted his head off of the pillow to whisper one last thing to him. "Wait- Dean... if... If I don't-... I just wanna say I'm sorry..." When the doctors came in, he nodded once and let him go, before turning to look at Castiel. "Take care of Dean if anything happens, alright..?"

Though he was a little disappointed they needed to leave again so soon, Castiel stood slowly as Sam said his farewell to Dean... It didn't sound like just a simple goodbye - it sounded final. Pursing his lips, he nodded and squeezed Sam's hand assuringly. "I will... Farewell Sam, we will see you soon," releasing his hand, the ex angel grinned, attempting to lighten the atmosphere in the room by leaning over him, and touching the tip of the younger Winchester's nose. "Boop!" Turning his head when the doctor cleared his throat, the ex angel quickly swept after Dean. He was worried for Sam, but found (to both his amusement and frustration) that he couldn't focus on just one stream of thoughts for very long. He then decided that he would never drink espresso again.


	7. Chapter 7

Dean walked at about the same speed back as he did there, and Castiel was no longer running back and forth. In fact, Dean lost Cas a couple times before he trotted quickly to catch back up. He began to get lost in his thoughts, about the other night, watching the fireballs hurl to the earth an light up the clouds. His angel's grace cut from him and tearing to pieces in his arms. His Sammy in the hospital, hardly recovering despite how hard he tried to hide it from Dean. He began to think about the breakfast and the movies and the.. Cuddling. He turned his head to look sideways at Cas but his eyes met nothing but air. He stopped abruptly, and looked about frantically. "Cas?... CAS?!" He yelled louder as no response came from anywhere, and he began to back track to look where he might have lost his little puppy. "Cas? Where are you man? Cas?!"

Tagging along behind Dean now, his super-high beginning to wear off... But not by much. Several times he'd stop to look at his reflection, getting completely caught up in only seeing his human face and not the angel grace shining behind his eyes - the little things humans were blind to, like his wings before they were stripped of him as well. He half wondered how his brothers and sisters were faring... And if he ran into them, would he even be able to tell them apart since they were all human and trapped in their vessels (now their /own/ bodies) too...? Eventually Castiel lost track of when Dean had started walking further ahead, and a soft noise from nearby caught his attention. Looking down to his left, Castiel watched as a tiny black creature scurried down into the shadows of an alleyway. He didn't even think twice before following it. It was a kitten, hardly two months old, with white paws and bright green eyes. Smiling as he approached the small being, he bent over and reached for it, but the kitten mewed and took off deeper into the alley, passing overturned garbage bins. "Come back, little cat, I will not hurt you... I only wish to help!"

Dean heard some scuffles through an alleyway and so he decided to stroll down it. Hearing a familiar voice softly yelling, he walked a little faster, attempting to catch up with Castiel, barely seeing him turn a corner. "Cas! C'mon man what're you doing?" He continued to follow quickly, yet silently.

The kitten continued to evade Castiel until they reached a dead end, a chain fence too tall to hop, and with links too small for it to slip through. He didn't even hear Dean approaching from behind anymore, but knelt on the ground in front of the small cat, ushering it up protectively into his arms despite it's mewls of protest. "Sshhh, I shall take care of you, little one..." He promised, thumbing it's soft fur, slightly alarmed to feel its ribs and spine - it made his heart ache to see a creation of the lord in such a state. It had obviously been going hungry for quite some time.

By the time Dean had caught up with Castiel, the man was knelt on the pavement infront of a fence talking to the ground, it seemed. "Cas, what are you doing?" He wasn't frustrated, per se, but he was rather confused about the situation, and just wanted an answer. When Castiel stood finally and turned to face him, he noted a tiny black object in his arms. He moved closer to Castiel, slowly, to get a better look at what he niw saw was a kitten. A very sickly looking one, so skinny it was surely near death. "A kitten?" He reverted hus eyes from the creature and looked at Castiel.

With some more gentle coaxing and soft words, eventually Castiel managed to get the kitten to stop struggling. It relaxed into the crook of his elbow against his chest, purring under the touch of the ex angel's fingers. "I'm sorry Dean," without looking up from kitten, he stood and turned to face him. "He needs my help... Can I keep him...?" They met eyes, and Castiel's ocean blues were full of compassion for the little creature he held. He didn't want to abandon it.

Dean normally wasn't keen on pets, but the look in Castiel's eyes softened his heart, and the condition of this poor animal had him sold. "Yes, of course you can." He said. He gave Cas a soft side smile as the happiness lit up in his eyes, "but... That means you take full responsibility! We'll go buy some cat food on the way." He waved his hand for Cas to come, and they walked side by side until they found a pet store for supplies. He ordered Castiel to wait outside as to not worry the workers about anything, and it took him a while to find the right food and he bought a small bag of indoor kitten chow and a few cans of Fancy Feast. He returned and opened the bag to hand Cas a handful of kibbles to feed the kitten until they made it back.

Lighting up as Dean agreed he could keep him, Castiel nodded in thanks. "Yes, I can take full responsibility..." Though he knew next to nothing on how to care for cats, and he would likely need a bit of help with it at first, it wouldn't take long for him to do it on his own. He had always been a fast learner. On the way back, as Dean went in to fetch some supplies, the kitten had fallen asleep, content and warm in his arms. When Dean came back, they proceeded on back to the motel room, Castiel entering first and sitting on the edge of the bed and keeping the baby cat cradled against him. He knew he should probably wake it up, or place it on the mattress to prepare everything it would be needing for the next little while, but he was reluctant to let it go. Looking up at Dean helplessly, he flashed the hunter a sheepish smile. "I... What should I do now?"

Dean took a few ofthe pillows from one bed and fluffed them together in a pile, "lay him down, let him rest. You can feed him when he wakes up." He let Cas do as instructed as he put on another movie at low volume, Lion King. He came back, and with the beds still pushed together, he let the kitten sleep between them. "You should make sure you have a few kibbles for him to munch on once he wakes up, but dont feed him too quickly, his stomach will burst if you do that."

Laying the kitten down gingerly on top of its makeshift bed on the pillows, he did his best not to wake the little thing. It hardly stirred, except to purr softly under Castiel's touch before drifting back into sleep. The sound pleased him greatly, and only once he was sure it wasn't going to get up and scamper off, did he finally stand to fetch a small paper dish off of a counter nearby and lay it on the floor. He poured in a few kibbles, hoping that what little he /did/ put in there wash going to be too much. Digging through the bag of supplies Dean brought from the store, he pulled out a plastic bowl and filled it with water before placing it beside the food. He'd worry about a box for the cat to relieve itself in after it woke up, but for now he simply crawled back up onto the bed with Dean and laid with the kitten in between them, trying not to disturb it. "Thank you, Dean..."

Dean simply nodded and kept his eyes towards the screen. He remembered the first time he saw this movie, young enough that Mary was still pregnant with Sam, and he remembered crying when Mufasa died, and it was still a painful scene but surely no longer enough to bring him to tears, after everything he's seen now. It dawned on him that Cas might not take it so lightly, though, considering he freaked out at Blazing Saddles. As the stampede was storming through the pass, he started to watch Cas for his reactions.

Though he was slightly distracted by the dozing kitten resting on its pillow in between them, Castiel brought the main focus of his attention back to the movie. He surprisingly found it much more enjoyable than Blazing Saddles and Braveheart. The young lion was disobedient and prideful, but even so, his father - the king - loved him so... And Cas found himself trying not to reference this to his own existence. Watching as the wildebeests trampled through the gorge, and Simba later found his father lying dead, Castiel sat up suddenly with a choked noise, eyes pricking with moisture. "I-! D-Dean~! He can't be..." But he was. Mufasa was dead, and now the uncle scar was trying to kill Simba as well, so that /he/ could be ruler... It was shocking, how painful this was to him. "H-how is this a... A children's movie...?!" His expression was completely distressed and devastated. Reaching out instinctively to clutch at Dean's sleeve, his fingers dug into the material as the young lion fled the hyenas. "This is so... So /tragic/..." He was so new to emotions, it was almost cruel what the hunter was putting him through.

Dean tried his best to hold his laughter back, but nonetheless small noises escaped him. Cas was a little cute, and Dean concurred with himself that he could watch Cas freak out at movies all the time. He looked ar Cas to discover watery eyes, and with one breaching the bottom lid, quickly travelling to his cheek, Dean wiped it with his thumb. "It's okay, Cas, everything works out eventually, just watch." He smiled.

Hearing the suppressed snickering, Castiel whipped his head around and glared at him through his glassy eyes. "It's not- funny! Why are you laughing?" He demanded, huffing as Dean swiped a tear from his cheek. Turning away stubbornly, yet keeping his grip on the other's sleeve, he continued watching the movie as the kitten continued to doze in between them.

he contued to monitor Castiel's reactions as the movie played on. the young cub turned into an adult lion, with his two unorthodox companions, and then the female from before found him and after some debate, Simba chose to go back, seeing the devastation to his home. He looked to Cas, "this is my favourite part" he whispered as Timon and Pumba did the luau, and he erupted in laughter, but not too loud as to not disturb the sleeping figure.

Eventually the ex angel calmed himself enough to sit back again to enjoy the movie, half curling around the kitten with his head next to Dean's. He laughed too - a noise that was still foreign to him - and he covered his mouth to stifle the chuckles. "... I think I've found my favourite film," he decided.

Large, happy lines creased Dean's features when he smiled at Castiel and when the movie ended happily he got up to exchange the discs for his all time favourite trilogy: Back to the Future. When he crawled back with that smile still on his face, he looked to Cas again, "these will change your life forever" he said excitedly.

While laying on the bed and watching Dean change the films, he noticed how late it was becoming - they'd done naught but watch movies all day. It was getting harder and harder to stay awake, feeling all of his previous energy drain out of his limbs and mind. He was more exhausted than he thought... Perhaps this was what humans called a 'caffeine crash'. Doing his best to not show his fatigue to Dean, he slowly trudged up off the bed and dug in the motel room mini fridge to pull out what was left of his fries and burger. It didn't look or smell too appealing when cold, so he heated it in the microwave until it was suitably warm. Bringing it back to the bed and sitting up so the container was on his lap and he could watch the movies without passing out, he hummed contently and chewed through his burger slowly. Taking up a fry, he was about to put it in his mouth when he glanced at Dean out of the corner of his eye... He held it out to him instead, a silent offer.

Despite his excitement for his movies, he was getting quite drowsy. He chomped on the fry that was offered to him, and then he let himself slump down further, nestling into the pillows that the kitten also rested on. He found himself having trouble keeping his eyes open, but he still mumbled a few quotes here and there, but before he knew it, he was passed out. He slept deeply for the first time in a while, with Cas by his side, separated only by a kitten. He woke slowly by a small mewling noise. He felt something on his face, and he opened his eyes to find the kitten had woken and was pawing at him. He let out a soft laugh and sat up, Cas wasn't awake yet, so he shook him lightly, while the cat continued to crawl on him.

Castiel watched Dean hunker down on the bed after a while, and once he finished his food, Castiel followed. Laying back with the pillow and kitten in between them, he kept his eyes open for as long as he could, before giving up and curling on his side. Tucking his forehead next to Dean's chest (without touching so he wouldn't wake him) the ex angel softly fingered the kitten's tiny paws. Smiling, he drifted off into sleep...

Morning came too quickly. When Dean shook his shoulder to try and wake him, he turned his face into the blankets with a tired grunt. It was only when a warm little paw sank into his hair did he finally open his eyes. Lifting his head, which ended up pushing the kitten onto Dean's face, Castiel flashed a sleepy smile as he reached up to pet the slender cat. "'Morning..." He greeted, before stealing the cat by lifting him up and rolling over to place him on his chest.

With the ability to now sit up properly he did so, and watched Cas pet the cat and smile and make faces at it. However, he couldn't ignore how much it was meowing. Though the cat could hardly let out a crackled noise, Dean knew the sound of hunger. "Why don't cha feed him? I will gather newspaper and a box" Dean suggested as he slipped off the bed and started looking around for some kind of box. He ended up having to go out to the back of the building, he came back with the best, least rotted box he could find, and set the morning paper inside it after separating pages.

Sitting up after a while with the kitten cradled in his palms, Castiel nodded. He hadn't yet showed the cat where his food was. While Dean went off to go collect a box, he brought the little wiggling creature to the plate of food and sat him down in front of it. Immediately the cat began eating the little kibbles, and Castiel knelt beside it to watch with fascination... This cat made him feel fuzzy inside, and he hadn't even had it for 24 hours yet. Petting him while he ate and drank, he didn't turn around when Dean came back in and set up the litter box. "I think we should... Name him."

Dean came and knelt next to Castiel, "He's yours, you name him." He said plainly, he never really had pets, he never had to name anything. Nonetheless he ran through a few names in his head silently, waiting for Cas to suggest one.

Though Castiel knew that he was to have full responsibility over the cat, that he /owned/ him, he'd never actually had to name anyone or anything. Naming things was always for God and the humans, not for the angels... He lacked severely in the creativity department, but after a long while of watching the kitten eat, and grinning as it made a tiny hiccup/burp noise, he came closer to deciding on a name. One could tell already that this would be a very lively cat once he got his strength back. And if climbing on their faces, mewing until the humans woke up was anything to go by, he might turn out to be a little trickster... "Gabriel," Cas sighed, as the cat moved away from the now empty food-dish in search of more. He wouldn't be getting any until later, because Castiel didn't want to make him ill like Dean had warned him about. "His name will be Gabriel."


	8. Chapter 8

Dean let out a puff of air from his nose and patted Cas on the back lightly once, as he stood and walked to find his jacket and keys. "I'm starved myself, how about you?" He wanted to go to a different place this time, a little further away, a surprise for Castiel.

Looking over his shoulder when Dean patted his back, he cast the kitten a sidelong glance as it mewed and rubbed his head against Cas's fingers that were now motionless within his reach. He was quite hungry, now that he mentioned it... It was almost annoying, how many times humans needed to stop in their days and eat. At least three times to be healthy. "...Yes. More burgers?" He inquired, petting Gabriel one last time before standing and tugging his jacket off his bed, already made since no one slept in it. He was loathe to leave his new cat in the motel room, but figured it would be fine since there was no other way in and out of here.

"Second best thing, i promise." He waited on Cas and when they left, they slid into the Impala this time. Dean drive for about ten minutes in medium traffic and finally arrived at iHop. As he pulled up and parked, a large grin marred his face. Aside from pies for supper and burgers for breakfast, iHop was Dean's secret favourite place to eat.

Sitting quietly in the car, already missing his tiny new friend, Castiel narrowed his eyes in scrutiny as they pulled up to Ihop. He didn't understand why they were going to the 'second best' place for food, instead of /the/ best place, but he didn't question Dean's choice. He'd try anywhere that Dean liked. "No espresso's for me," He told him, casting the man a serious yet slightly embarrassed look. His behaviour the previous day was absolutely inexcusable - he was horrified in himself.

"I wouldn't let you if you tried." Dean laughed. He was much too excited for such fine dining, and for his sextuplet maple and cinnamon french toast platter. He loved it almost equally as he lived pie. They walked in and were seated in a quieter booth by the hostess, and were informed that Anna would be their server. Dean ordered the usual black coffee for a starting drink to give Castiel some time to scan through the menu. "No lunch burgers, cheater" as he noticed Cas flipping slowly passed the breakfast section.

Sitting across from him, and hardly looking up at the waitress as she flashed Dean a flirtatious wink. The action made him bristle slightly, but it didn't show in his face, only in the tightness of his shoulders. He didn't like promiscuity. Flipping through the breakfast pages to get to the burgers, Cas blinked as Dean told him not to. Staring up at him with wide blue eyes, he huffed and return to the breakfast section. All of the things on the menu were completely foreign to him. "I... I don't know what I want... Help?"

Dean thought for a moment as he analyzed what Castiel might like. Before e could finish his thoughts, Anna had come back to take their order. He batted his eye lashes at her, "we'll share the Cinnamon-Maple french toast platter." He ordered without much thought going into it. It was a huge plate, and very sweet, he hoped Cas would like it. After she smiled and walked away, Dean turned back to Cas and twined his hands together with his elbows on the table, "so you still wanting that tattoo?"

As the waitress returned, he stared up at Dean, almost irritated with watching him flirt back. He heard her giggle in taking the order, but he didn't take his eyes away. Gripping the side of the table until his fingers were turning white, he didn't relax again until she left. When she finally did, he sighed and folded his hands on his lap beneath the table, flexing his one hand to get the circulation going properly again. "Yes, I am," he told him, keeping his eyes fixed on the tablecloth now. "I need to have my wings again... Even if I cannot fly with them."

Dean frowned at that, "okay well how about today?" He asked, "we can go make sure Gabe is okay for food and litter and the guy is only about half an hour away." He suggested.

Castiel thought it over, before nodding slowly. He'd like to make sure his cat was okay before going off to do anything else today. "I would like that very much... Thank you, Dean," he flashed the other a half smile before the waitress returned with their dish. Sitting back as she set it on the table in front of them, he raised a brow at the hunter sitting across from him. "What are these again?" He asked him, before poking at one of the top, flat golden cakes with a fork.

Dean, having stuffed a whole piece of french toast in his face, muffled some thing that was supposed to mean, "the best thing next to pie" and resumed his hungered chewing. The mix of whipped cream, cinnamon, icing sugar, and maple made Deans mouth tingle with pleasure. He hummed softly into his food, and he took gulps of his coffee between bites. The bitter coffee was a pleasing contrast to the cavities surely forming.

Taking in a deep whiff of the French toast, his stomach gurgled loudly. It smelled delicious, and if Dean was devouring them madly, they had to taste just as good. Cutting off a good portion and dipping it into the puddle of syrup, the ex angel took a bite, closing his eyes and groaning with approval. "/Mmmff/..." The explosion of flavour in his mouth was all it took for Castiel to completely fall in love with a new type of food... He'd thought hamburgers were the best thing in the human world, up until now. He wondered what else humanity had to offer in this field.

They devoured the food in equal portions, but ate like wolves. Feeling a little bloated, Dean sat back to let his stomach partially digest his food enough to at least move. He excused himself to the washroom, and when he returned, left a few bills on the table, enough to pay for their meal and leave Anna a nice tip. Dean always tipped generously. Dean started the Impala, "next time, I'm cooking for you" he grinned. He went back to the apartment, let Castiel do his thing. "Is he using the make-shift litter box?" After his answer he simply just pulled out onto the road once more. He informed Castiel of the man's history of hunting and how his legs had gotten eaten off by some monster and so he practiced the arts of tattooing exclusively for hunters. He could put spells and protections within his art, "the guys name is d'Artagnan". Not long after, Dean pulled to a stop and parked at a seemingly desolate area.

Finishing off his portion not long after Dean, he groaned and held his stomach contently. He was still trying to wrap his mind around how such food could even exist, when Dean told him he'd be the one cooking next time. A soft shade of pink touched his cheeks at the offer. So far as he knew, Dean didn't prepare meals very often. When Dean came back from the bathroom, Cas had already cleaned the sticky syrup from his hands and mouth. They left, and Castiel didn't give Anna a second glance as they drove away.

Climbing out of the car again once they got back to the motel, Castiel went in while Dean waited outside. Going in and closing the door behind him just in case, he didn't expect the sight he saw upon turning around. Hands flying up on top of his head, Castiel cringed at the sight of the room. Toilet paper had been tracked /everywhere/. Over the beds, in between them, all over the floor, leading to one massive ball - at the centre of which, Gabriel was rolling in playfully. "Gabriel is a name that suits you perfectly, little one..." Shaking his head and proceeding in carefully, stepping over the chaos of wipe, he checked the litter box to see that yes, he'd been using it. They'd have to clean that, and the room when they got home again, but for now he didn't have time. Quickly leaving some more kibbles and changing the water, Castiel left and didn't say a thing to Dean as he got back in the car. He'd see it all later.

They hopped out of the car and Dean walked to knock on the giant garage door, and just before he did so, the door rolled open loudly. "Dean Winchester" the man greeted, "what in blazing hell are you doing here?" He asked. Dean laughed a little, "nice to see you too, man" d'Artagnan looked around Dean's shoulder, "where's Sam?" Dean took a moment to explain vaguely, and then "this here is Castiel, he's... Well i'll let him tell you, if he wants." He gestured for Cas to move forward and talk to the man. Before Castiel spoke, d'Artagnan asked about the only thing he needed to know, "what are you, Castiel?"

While they drove, nervous anticipation began coiling deep in the pit of his gut. He didn't like the feeling, but couldn't stop himself from experiencing it anyway. It was an emotion he couldn't suppress. When they arrived and Dean climbed out of the car, the ex angel hesitated a moment longer before following, sticking his fingers in the pockets of his trench coat. d'Artagnan, at least, seemed to be a nice enough man, judging from the way he hit it off so easily, and so quickly with Dean. Nodding in greeting, a barely-there smile touched his lips. It didn't reach his eyes - they were still sorrowful... Moving a little closer to stand at a comfortable talking distance, and so that no one else would overhear, he finally spoke up. "I am human, now," he stated first. "... But I used to be an angel of The Lord. I've had my grace... Taken... From me... And that has made me mortal." He chose to be as vague as possible. Telling the whole thing was far too painful. Physical pain he could tolerate - but this new, emotional pain, was something else entirely. It was enough to cripple him on his first night, and he didn't want to feel it like that again. Never again.

d'Artagnan shurgged indifferetly as if he almost wasnt surprised at a fallen angel. "Was wondering what the lights were the other night" he said simply. Dean cocked his head back and raised his eyebrows, d'Artagnan spike again "so i reckon you wantin' wings? " he asked simply.

Castiel tried not to cringe at the reminder of the fall, but a twitch at the mouth betrayed his feelings. He nodded almost sheepishly in confirmation. "... Yes. And an antipossession sigil between them..." Lowering his eyes, he folded his hands before him and watched his thumbs slowly circle each other. He didn't quite know how to ask the other if he'd be willing to do it for him.

d'Artagnan nodded and waved him over as he began walking back inside his garage. "Let's get 'er started then, shall we?"


	9. Chapter 9

d'Artagnan lead them to surprisingly sterile room, with a proper tattoo chair and the whole works. d'Artagnan adjusted the chair so Castiel could sit backwards comfortably. He showed him to pictures of wings, one that had small feathery ones, and one that had long wispy ones. "I can do either in one sitting. These will take me about an hour," he pointed at the small ones, "and these, about three hours. An added sigil will only take 20 minutes." He proposed. Dean didn't say anything but he certainly liked the wispy ones.

a sense of relief washed over him as d'Artagnan ushered him in with the offer, and he looked on with interest as he began looking over the images in the book. While the man turned the pages, only one pair of wings stood out to him the most. They were modelled like a raven's, and extended out over the shoulder down the upper arm. When the arms were extended, it looked like the wings followed the motions. "This one," he said quietly, fingering the wispy designs. "I'd like this pair..."

"Done and done" and after popping a piece of gum in his mouth and uttering for Cas to relax his muscles more, and didn't talk at all after that. He prepared the ink and his needle. He would start with the sigil first. He put the needle to his skin. Dean watched closely, and while giving d'Artagnan enough room to work, Dean sat in front of Cas, watching him, and distracting him with light conversation.

After it was decided, the ex angel dropped his jacket and shirt to where d'Artagnan gestured him to. He went to lay on the chair, positioning himself as he was told to before casting Dean one last nervous glance. Closing his eyes as the needle touched his skin, at first he clenched his fists tightly gritting his teeth from the sting. But before long, the constant piercing of his skin with the rapid moving needle made him relax. His back was becoming surprisingly numb to it. "Nnnh..." He grunted, half burying his face into the seat as the needle buzzed on.

Dean felt something course through him for a fleeting moment, and he continued his watching. It didn't take long for Dean to close his eyes an simply listen to Cas. He wasn't sure what his mind was doing with him but he couldn't get enough of Castiel's moans. He opened his eyes to see Castiel had gotten a little more intense.

The buzzing needle continued to drag over his skin, out over his shoulders. He could feel the first feather becoming part of his flesh, and his fists tightened into the leather. d'Artagnan encouraged him to relax again, and he tried his best to do so despite the way he squirmed. Heat flushing into his cheeks as the tingling feeling crept out over his shoulder, he let out another soft whimper as he looked up at Dean. He didn't like pain, but somehow this was... different. "Aaahhh..."

When dean met eyes with Castiels almost watering blues, he caved inside. His chest felt full, but everything seemed to make gravity more forceful. He couldn't rip Cas from his view, and every moan hand him hanging in the air. He bit the inside of his lip, and it dug deep, but it didn't bleed. He offered a hand for Castiel to cling to, though he doubted the offer would be taken.

Nearly panting as the pair met eyes, the look on Dean's face indescribable while directed at him. He'd never seen his eyes such a dark green before. Curling his body against the chair, d'Artagnan's firm hand shoving his spine back down before continuing the tattoo. Castiel reached for Dean's hand as it was offered, threading his fingers through the other's and giving him a tight squeeze. Perhaps now he'd be able to keep himself from writhing. "Nnh... Deeeaan~..." He mewled, clinging to his hand.

Dean let Cas claw his hand, and he never would have guessed that Cas was so damn strong. His eyes focused more and his teeth broke the sensitive skin inside his mouth. He would have winced but the intensity of Cas's rough voice declaring his name made him feel something poke at his insides and he wiggled his hips to find his pants were still loose but had become strangely uncomfortable.

Tugging him in closer, Cas tucked Dean's hand next to his face. Closing his eyes again, he half nuzzled into the man's fingers for comfort. It felt much better to have Dean nearby while there was stinging pain, and numb tingles fanning over his skin. He lost track of how much time passed, groaning and squirming his feet, until d'Artagnan patted his elbow to let him know he'd finished. "How... How does it look...?" He asked Dean, smiling slightly.

Dean let his hand fall from Cas's and he walked around him to have his eyes met with an inky and bloody back. He stared for a moment before he muttered, "Cas... That looks awesome..." He looked to d'Artagnan with a wide mouthed expression and all he could form with his mouth was a soundless thank you. D'Artagnan nodded and waved Deans hand away from his wallet. "My pleasure" he said. Dean looked back at Castiels back and found himself transfixed by the rolling muscles and the mix of ink and blood smeared everywhere. The heaving of his upper back from his lungs expanding made the muscles move under the skin.

Still smiling, and finding himself loving the feel of the burning tingle on his back, Castiel sat up and rolled his shoulders once before d'Artagnan began cleaning up the area and holding up a mirror so that Cas could see the work done. He sighed adoringly at the wings spread wide over his back and shoulders. He missed his real wings, but in their absence, this would do perfectly. "I love them... Thank you," he cast the older man a grateful sidelong glance. He was then given instructions to take care of it, and a cream to rub over the tattoo.

He watched Cas get bandaged up and they gave d'Artagnan a fair goodbye, Dean uttering another thank you. On the road back, Dean almost couldn't watch the road. They made it back eventually anyway, and Dean yawned in his way to unlock the door, and as he opened the door, his mouth dropped again. He scanned the room, observing the disaster, movement catching his view by his duffel. He ran to it and the cat had ripped up a few condom packages, a "Busty Asian Beauties" magazine, and a new magazine he picked up that had strong, well sculpted men with dark hair and tattoo's of angel wings. None of which, Dean thought, were as beautiful as Castiel's, but he wanted an idea... He snatched it all up and threw it in the trash. He picked him up and thrust him in Cas's arms. "You little shit" he muttered as he cleaned like a mad woman, almost spotless when he was done. He looked at Cas and waited for an explanation.

Once he was bandaged up, Cas struggled to pull on his clothing once more. Before they left, he thanked the artist more sincerely. He was looking forward to wearing his new wings. On the drive back, Castiel debated several times over whether or not now was a good time to tell Dean about the mess Gabriel had made in the motel. Unfortunately he couldn't get past opening and closing his mouth several times soundlessly as they opened the door. Stepping in and hanging his head a little as he watched Dean tense in irritation, his eyes wandered to the side of the bed where Gabriel had torn several of Dean's things out of his bag. Eyes widening as he stared at the open condom package and the book full of near-naked men with angel wings on their back, Cas made a choked noise as Dean dumped all of his skin mags into the trash. Taking the kitten wordlessly, he cradled it to his chest to protect him from Dean's wrath as he cleaned the place. When the hunter looked to him expectantly, Cas glanced down at the joyful bundle of fluff in his palms (avoiding Dean), and he furrowed his brows at it. "Bad Gabriel." Maybe Cas could escape a scolding too.

"Dont give me that! You knew about this didn't you?" He yelled at both the human and the cat. "Seriously?" He put his hands on his hips and let out a huff of breath. "I'm going to kill you both." He plopped on the bed and fluffed a pillow for himself. "Good night Cas, don't let that thing screw anything else up!"


	10. Chapter 10

Dean tried to sleep but could feel eyes on him.

Shoulders slouching guiltily at Dean's accusation, he cradled Gabriel protectively near and pet his soft black fur. He continued to stand there petting him, not saying a word to Dean or even looking up at him until the hunter flopped down on top of their joined mattresses. Sighing, he shuffled a little closer to Dean's side of the bed. "My apologies..." He frowned. "I.. Did not want you to be angry.." Sitting on the bed by his knees, he placed Gabriel next to him and watched the kitten climb over his lower back up to his shoulders, purring loudly.

Dean huffed. he knew Castiel wouldn't let this go, and he couldn't ignore, knowing how upset he already was with everything that has happened. he rolled over to meet Cas's worried gaze. "Cas... it's not a huge deal, i just overreacted. he's new, he's obviously going to cause trouble." he tried to soften the tension in Cas's form, but it hardly worked. "it's okay Cas. you're forgiven and I'm sorry" he gave him a small smile for re-assurance.

Castiel sighed, and sat on the edge of the bed next to Dean while little Gabriel crawled up to the hunter's chin and rubbed his head against him. He couldn't look up at him yet, even if he claimed he wasn't upset anymore. "No, I should have told you..." He uttered under his breath, rolling his shoulders ever so slightly and hissing at the sting his tattoo gave him. "I've... I've messed up again, Dean, and /I'm/ sorry... You don't need to be."

Dean rolled his eyes at how ridiculous Castiel was being, "so there you go. All is well and forgiven, now sleep, but be careful of Gabe climbing on you, and don't sleep on it." He, of course, was referring to his new tattoo, still a slick mixture of blood and ink under the bandage. "We will lotion it in the morning." And with that, he passed out cold. Whether Cas might have continues pestering him or if his phone rang, that was too bad. The elder Winchester needed rest.

He blinked solemnly at Dean before sighing and moving away again. He still didn't feel much better, but for now it would have to do. Stepping away from the bed, and stripping carefully out of his clothes while trying not to pull the skin of his back with his movements, he dropped everything aside except for his boxers as he crawled over on top of his bed. Tonight, there was a large gap in between them, but Castiel didn't want to move in closer to disturb the already sleeping man. Instead, he drifted off too, lying on his belly with the kitten curled against his side...

In the morning, he woke first, and it was very early. The sun hadn't even risen up into the sky yet. His back was still very sore, and moving it made him grimace. Lifting himself up off the mattress, he shuffled over to relieve himself in the bathroom. He also would have liked to use this time to take a shower, but he needed to wait for Dean to instruct him about what to do about his tattoo first. Instead, he brushed his teeth and sighed at his reflection. All these little human things just seemed... So mundane. A waste of time. Time that humans had so /little/ of (and now, Castiel was cursed with a time limit too). Sleep was the worst of it all - it sapped so many hours of their lives, and they didn't even know it... He hated it, but loved it. He hated how much he found himself loving sleep, and how fuzzy and refreshed he felt in the morning. Thinking of it was troubling, so the ex angel sighed and rubbed a towel over his face which was beginning to grow dark with stubble too. He'd have to ask Dean for help with /that/ as well... Turning and walking back into the room, still only wearing his boxers, his eyes landed on the hunter who was peacefully asleep at least for the time being. He felt a now familiar ache in his chest, and it twisted within him in a way that he hadn't felt before. It grew stronger the longer he stared... Pulling his eyes away, he started back toward the bed, curling up in the blankets, this time on his side to watch Dean sleep again... If he were going to tolerate just how much time sleeping stole from him, this would be his reason why. So long as he got to wake up to this every day, he'd be just fine with it...

Dean did not dream, as usual, and he woke up groggily and turned over, and after rubbing his eyes a little he opened them to greet Castiel's eyes. It almost surprised him but he couldn't seem to move, his eyes still and his breath still soft. "Mornin'" he managed to mutter, blinking once. With the morning light shining through, it highlighted both of their faces and vibrancy of their eyes, Dean felt a pull in his chest, something he hadn't felt since Lisa... He let his eyes blink again, and shook himself from the strange trance. He looked at the kitten curled next to Castiel and that's when he noticed that Cas was almost naked. His eyes got fixed for the second time this morning. The soft, almost pale skin gleamed in the light, and the rise and fall of his body due to his breathing was almost hypnotic. He cleared his throat, and sat himself up, "Cas, you're not wearing clothes.." He looked at him again and noticed the stubble coming out, and felt his own face, to feel that his was, too. It would be interesting to teach him everything, but he had no quarrels with doing it. "And you need to shave." He smiled.

Castiel nearly went back to sleep in the hour that it took for Dean to wake up as well, but the moment the other stirred, his gaze snapped back to alertness. They met eyes, and the ex angel drank in his features touched by the rays of sunlight creeping in their window. It occurred to him then, that Dean wasn't only beautiful when he was sleeping... He was also beautiful when waking from a good rest. "Hello Dean," he answered softly, lifting one arm to let it drape on top of the blankets. Gently petting Gabriel's head, soft enough not to wake him too, he nodded once against the pillow. "Yes, I... I sleep better without them," he confessed easily. "And I think I require your help with shaving".

Dean shrugged, "well come on, then." He said as he rubbed a hand over his face again. He stood and walked to the bathroom, and took out his large package if razors. Dean wasn't picky about much but he was picky about razors, he didn't like to use them more than once, so he always bought the extra large bags of disposable ones. He grabbed the shaving cream, and placed it between the two razors he set out. "Just put this stuff on your face, but only where you want to shave, no use in putting it on your forehead, of course." He laughed internally as a picture if Cas with cream on his forehead came to mind. After he lathered his own on his face he handed it to Cas, and waited.

Pulling the blankets off himself, and carefully leaving the bed so he didn't disturb the cat, Castiel followed Dean back into the bathroom. Hovering over the other man's shoulder and sighing at his reflection again, he nodded and watched Dean apply the cream. Brows furrowing in curiosity, he tilted his head and touched the cream on Dean's jaw. The foam was cool, and felt rather strange between his thumb and forefinger. As the can was passed to him, he squirted it onto his palm like he'd seen Dean do... Before squishing it into his stubble and frowning. Slowly he lathered it over his face, but some of it got up his nose and he sneezed.

Dean raised one eyebrow as he observed the ex-angel attempt a regular human exercise. When he sneezed something like a muffled snort came from Dean. "Careful," he laughed. He picked up a shaver for him self and ran it down the far right side of his jaw, cleaning the cream and stubble off, he turned the tap on to rinse the razor, and did not proceed with his own face but instead turned to Cas a he handed him the razor. "Now watch the angle, you can cut yourself real bad if you're not careful"

Castiel observed carefully as Dean dragged the razor down the corner of his jaw, effectively clearing both the foaming gel and the stubble in one slide. The ex angel quickly finished rubbing the foam over his own face, nearly smiling at how ridiculous they both looked in the mirror. When Dean passed the razor, he took it carefully and tried repeating what he'd watched on his own face now. Pressing it to the top corner of his jaw, he slid it along carefully, feeling the steady drag of the blades removing the little hairs. It went well until he got lower, to the crook of his jaw and neck where his stubble ended. Pressing a little to hard, he hissed and pulled it away from his skin when he cut himself accidentally. Dean had warned him about this, and he frowned with disappointment as a tiny bead of blood formed on his skin and mixed with the gel. The sting was unbelievable, but he could tolerate it. "I'm sorry, Dean."

"Don't be sorry dude, everyone cuts them selves once in a while, even experienced guys." He reassured him. He reached over to grab the razor, "here, give it to me." He turned Castiel so they faced each other. He began to carefully slide the blades down his face, slowly, only going to the jawline for now, as he figured he could do the underneath after. "You are ridiculous though, this will be a roller coaster of fun until you get used to it." Feeling Cas's skin pull underneath the blade pulling the stubble, and the sound of it grinding it away, he got transfixed again. Not too much as to cut Castiel, but instead, his concentration heightened as every inch of Castiel's face became clearer, and eventually dean got to under his nose. "Now do this" he said as he tucked his upper lip behind his teeth. He smiled at how nervous Castiel seemed with the sharp blades on his face, and Dean being so close.

Castiel was actually glad to have the ridiculous-looking shaving cream all over his face. It covered some of the nervous blush crawling up into his cheeks. However, the more Dean uncovered, the more of it he'd be able to see... Instead of focusing on how close Dean's face was to his, he closed his eyes, staying perfectly still except for when gentle fingers tilted his head this way and that, and let the other shave his stubble away. As the razor slid over his skin, at some moments he tensed when he thought it was going to cut him, but Dean's hand stayed steady. He began to relax, enjoying it and humming softly until Dean instructed him to do something. Cracking open an eye, he saw Dean suck his upper lip under his teeth, and the blush returned as he repeated the action, both eyes opening to stare at him.

Dean tried not to meet Castiel's gaze, but he enjoyed his peripheral view. Looking back at his shaven section of Cas's face he noted a tinge of pink there and wondered if he was too rough with the razor or if Castiel was blushing. He smiled to himself and finished his job, he had Castiel put his chin up so he could do the tender underside. Being extra careful with his throat, he slid it a little slower, making sure to curve around the contours of muscle and his adam's apple. The strings of veins pulsed beneath the skin and stood out at Dean, and he tried not to get distracted once again. He finished, and instructed Cas to wash his face, and as he did so, Dean started back on his own face.

Castiel swallowed as the razor touched under his chin, and felt his adam's apple move under Dean's touch. He knew he shouldn't move, but he couldn't help it - it was a strange reflex. He held still after that though, a breathy sigh puffing past his lips as Dean finished shaving him. Reaching up and sliding his hands over his freshly shaved skin, he smiled when he felt how smooth it was. "Thank you, Dean..." The scent that now lingered on Castiel was often what he smelled on Dean. It made him secretly pleased that in some way, he smelled like him... Moving over to the sink, he soaked a cloth in warm water under the tap, before bending over to keep the water from dripping all over the floor. He could feel his tattoo pull at his skin sorely, but he ignored it for now. They still needed to put cream on it.


	11. Chapter 11

Dean glanced over quickly to see Castiel's tattoo had dried out, and it pulled. He finished his own face quickly. "Hey we gotta take care of that." He gestured toward the tattoo. "You have to take a really light shower though, to wash off the excess blood and ink. If you cant take a cold shower, luke warm at most okay?" He thought of setting the temperature for Cas but maybe it was better if he let Cas figure it out. "I'll be cleaning, yell if you need anything" and with that he left and closed the washroom door behind him. He paced a little, thinking about the was Castiel seemed to distract him so much lately, as he picked up more scraps of toilet paper from the floor.

Standing up straight and leaving the cloth beside the sink, Castiel appraised his reflection one last time before looking at Dean through the glass. "Yes, I'll do that..." Showers Castiel could work with. Waiting until Dean left the room, he kicked off his boxers and stepped toward the glass door. Twisting the knobs and feeling under the tap for the semi-cold water, he removed the shower hose from the wall and pressed it against his chest to let the cool water run down his front first. Bracing himself, he slowly moved it up his shoulder, letting the water trickle over his back so that there was no water pressure drumming against it. The water felt better on his back than he thought it would, and he let out a happy groan. Moving the shower head so that the water could trickle evenly over the ink and blood, he watched his feet where excess blood and ink washed off. There wasn't much of it, which must have been a good sign. After he'd soaked it, careful not to touch his scabs, Castiel eventually moved on to wash the rest of his body. Lathering his hair with the motel's shampoo, and using a bar of soap everywhere else, he left the shower after about 20 minutes, completely clean, and pretty chilled from the cool water. Stepping out and dabbing his body down with a nearby towel, he was about to step into his boxers again, but their smell made his nose wrinkle. He definitely needed a different wardrobe. Dropping them, and messing his hair spectacularly with the towel, he wrapped it around his hips and left the room. Heading for Dean's bag without even looking at him, he fished out a fresh pair of underwear, jeans, and a black, long sleeved shirt. Wordlessly, he retreated to the bathroom to change. Hopefully dean wouldn't mind.

Dean stopped everything, every action every thought... The sight of Castiel in only a towel wound around his waist, hair sticking up, wet and gleaming all over, he might have protested to Cas taking his clothes, but words failed him. He only watched the backside of him as he shuffled away back to the washroom. Even after the door closed again, he stared at it, unable to collect his thoughts. Mouth parted, and only blinking a couple times, he waited on Castiel to come back out of that room. It seemed to take forever, but eventually the handle turned and he walked out in Dean's jeans and shirt and he could only stare again. The jeans seemed to be one size too small for Cas, and they hugged his hips tightly, pronouncing some of his lower feature Dean never took the time to appreciate before. The shirt was a little tight also, Cas may have been shorter but his frame seemed to be just barely a tad wider than his own, and Dean couldn't love it more. "We should... Get you new clothes, huh?"

Arms hanging over his chest, hands holding the towel draped around his neck, Castiel stepped bare-footed back into the room glad to be in warm clothes. They were clean, and had the faintest scent of Dean on them. The leather of the impala, and shaving cream. It took all his willpower not to smile. Not only did he smell like Dean, he looked like him too. "It... It doesn't look too horrible, does it? I find your apparel is a little tight on me," Heading toward his side of the bed, Castiel lifted the container of cream for his tattoo and wiggled it in his fingers for the hunter to see. "We can get new clothes for me after we do this. It gets uncomfortable when its dry... Can you help me with it? I don't think I can reach it all..."

Watching the ex-angels mouth produce sounds, still unable to form proper thoughts let alone words and sentences, he simply nodded, and grabbed the bottle. He cleared his head so he could speak, but before he could ask, Castiel removed the shirt already. He lathered the cream in his hands, and placed the coolness to Cas's warm back. Being as gentle as possible, he ran it over the tender skin and muscle, feeling them move underneath his hands. Smooth skin slicked up with the lotion now, he slid his hands to spread it again without adding more cream. He reluctantly removed his hands from Castiel's body. "Um... Let that soak in for a while.. Where's Gabe?" He brought an arm up and rubbed the back of his neck as he felt a strange blush stain his cheeks.

Sitting on the edge of the bed with the shirt between his hands, Castiel turned slightly so Dean could sit behind him. Letting his head hang, and closing his eyes at the first cool touch of the lotion, he sighed and rolled his shoulders under the hunter's surprisingly gentle touch. When he finished, Castiel pulled the black shirt back over his head, before looking around for Gabriel. "That... Is a very good question," he wasn't on either of the beds. He wasn't eating or drinking from his dishes, and the litter box was empty aside from the cat's waste that he'd need to clean before they left. It wasn't until he stood up, about to peer under the beds that he seen him. Gabriel's little white paws were sticking out of Dean's shoes. His laces were undone, and one of them the kitten was chewing on. "There he is..." He said, crossing the room and stooping down to scoop the small creature out of Dean's shoe. He mewed in protest, but Castiel held him despite the squirming and carried him back toward the bed cooing affectionately. "Dean... Your face is red, are you not feeling well?"

The colour on his cheeks darkened and he felt the blood rush in him. "No, i'm fine" he fibbed, turning away. What the hell was happening with him? He pressed a hand to his hot face and sighed. "I'm hungry, you coming?" He grabbed his jacket and waited by the door. "Where do you want to go?"

Lips pressing into a thin line, concerned, Castiel pet the little kitten behind his ears before setting him down on the mattress. "Are you sure? If your body temperature is higher than normal it can't be a good sign..." He persisted, following Dean to the door. He wasn't an expert on humans, but he knew a few of the basic signs of illness... He didn't gather right away that he was just blushing. "I... Was thinking perhaps... Ingredients from a store. I'd... Like to try cooking." Apple pie. He wanted to make Dean a pie.

Dean raised an eyebrow and cracked a half smile. "Alright, lets go buy groceries. We need to get Gabe better cat food, too." He looked at the puff of fur rolling around. "May as well go somewhere where we can get you some quick cheap clothes too, just for now" he suggested.

Reaching for the trenchcoat he left hanging beside the door, Castiel slid into it and flattened it over his chest. "Yes... He can stomach more now, I think. He seems to be recovering quickly." He nearly smiled, not chasing after the fact Dean seemed to be ignoring his concern for the hunter's red face. It seemed to be fading now anyway.

They left in the Impala, and Dean didn't often shop for things at grocery stores but then again, he didn't often get to cook. He drove until he found a WAL-MART, and as he parked, "welcome to wally-world." He smiled. The first thing Dean needed, was a burger from mcDonald's, and he was sure Castiel wouldn't argue. "Burger heaven" he said.

Pulling into a parking space, Castiel leaned against his window and scrutinized Walmart with partially narrowed eyes, recalling a commercial he'd seen on the television some time ago. "Walmart has... Groceries as well as clothing?" (Bless his soul he's trying to learn human things.) The mention of 'burger heaven' made his ears perk, and he eagerly stepped out of the car to follow Dean inside. "There is such a place?"

The smile almost marred his face as it grew deviously. "You just wait" mcdicks was good but Cas hadn't tasted Dean's home-made burgers yet. When they got inside, Dean immediately went to the counter at McDonald's and ordered two quarter pounders with cheese and extra cheese, he then looked to Castiel waiting for his decision.

Looking sideways at Castiel acting strangely, and blushing slightly as Castiel's shoulder nearly met his own, he cleared his throat, "well, tell.." He glanced back to the cashier to read her name tag "... Tell Kattie what you want." He looked back to him, and almost lost his thoughts when he really observed just how shy and awkward he was.

For a while after staring at them, a broad grin crossed her features as she pressed the buttons on the machine for Dean's order. Fanning herself and trying to suppress squeals, Castiel eventually cleared his throat and gave the girl behind the cash register his order. "Thank you," he told her softly, watching the delight on her face before shrinking back behind Dean awkwardly.

Dean paid and after they got their food he immediately started walking towards the men's clothing section, beginning to eat on the way. Stuffing his cheeks full of his burger, he looked to Castiel who had apparently fallen back, staring at his food.

Taking his bag as it was given to him, Castiel turned to start following Dean, but when he opened the paper, the smell wafted up and hit his nose instantly. Mouth already watering, he eyed the golden fries and the box hungrily. Suddenly clothes were the last things on his mind and he just wanted to devour his food. Looking up at Dean an reminding himself that they couldn't spend all day here to sit and eat, he fished out his fries first and began shovelling them into his mouth as if he were starved. "Mm'srry Dean," he muffled out after a while, mouth too full to talk normally.

Dean laughed lightly, glad Castiel was enjoying the food. He put some standard socks in the cart as a start and stopped infront o the shirts. An array of regular tshirts to V-necks to log sleeved plaid and flannel shirts. "Go crazy. Choose and pick and decide later when you try them on"

Castiel walked down the aisle in front of Dean as the man gestured to where he should start looking. Immediately his eyes fell upon the plaid, and he pulled a couple blue button-ups off of the rack, holding them up to himself to make sure they would fit. It felt a bit ridiculous, but he seen a few others doing the same thing nearby. He was a little more careful in selecting the shirts. Looking over at Dean, his eyes narrowed at the man's outfit. How the neck of the shirt was just plain and round. As much as Castiel liked Dean's clothing, the circle around the neck felt too... Restricting. So he pulled a v-neck off of the shelf and held it up to himself for Dean to see. "Is this... Appropriate?"

Dean smiled at the blue plaid that would undoubtedly make his eyes stand out, and when he showed dean the v-neck shirt, he cocked his head to the side. V-necks were never something he ever really noticed before, "ya, its not like you have 'cleavage' , besides, you can try it on a decide." He explained. After Cas grabbed a few more shirts they moved to the bottoms, a rack of sweat pants, a rack of shorts and the rest was all jeans. He saw the undergarment section from the corner of his eye and blushed lightly. He blushed even more when he remembered that Castiel was wearing his briefs.

Castiel took only a couple different possibilities that he might like, stocking up on the v-necks before they went on. Immediately his nose wrinkled at the shorts. He wouldn't wear those things unless he absolutely /had/ to. He was, however, curious about the sweatpants, so he grabbed a pair of those and some dark blue jeans. For his first time shopping he figured he was doing quite well at deciding on things instead of relying on Dean all the time. Tugging gently on the cart to take Dean around the corner, he led them over to the undergarment section and eyed them seriously. There were many different sizes of these, and he didn't think he could take them out of the package to compare them to his private parts. This he might need Dean's help with... Looking around to make sure no one was looking, Castiel tugged at the front of his jeans to peer down and try and guesstimate his size. Frowning, he tried to locate a tag or something to give him a rough idea of what to purchase. Taking his hands out of his jeans immediately as a woman walked by, he didn't see the raised-brow look she gave him and Dean as Castiel took down a package of large briefs with a grin of accomplishment.

Dean's eyes grew when he saw Castiel grab at himself. He attempted to revert his eyes but they remained until a woman walked by, and Castiel quickly grabbed a package and threw it in. "Cool, so you ready to try them on?" He asked

Nodding and pulling down the front of his shirt semi awkwardly from the look he seen in Dean's eyes, his cheeks flushed a soft red. Nodding once, he eyed the objects he'd thrown in there. There was quite a few things in the cart now. Mowing down on his burger while they sought out the change rooms, they passed the ladies wear and Castiel couldn't help but eye a lacy white two-piece set. Blinking, he looked back at Dean with a red face as he remembered the den of iniquity. Stiffening as he walked, Castiel kept his eyes trained ahead from then on.

Dean, determined to not get distracted, hunted the change rooms down. He noted Castiel falter in keeping up for a mere moment, but chose to ignore it. He saw the sign and not log after, they made it. There was a sign instructing that only 6 items at a time were allowed. "Take the shirts, first" Dean smiled.

Nodding and collecting all the shirts and the plaid button-ups, leaving his jacket on the side of the cart with Dean, Castiel was then taken to a nearby stall by a worker. He hung up his things, closing the door behind himself before stripping out of Dean's shirt to try on his own. The first one he tried on was a white v neck shirt with a small baseball logo over his left pec. Pulling on a plaid over shirt and smiling at the cozy fit, Castiel opened the door again and checked for Dean. "I like these," he informed promptly, before going back in for a dark grey muscle shirt.

While Cas went into the change room, Dean sighed and thought, even though this might be one of the saddest times for him, he hadn't smiled so much in such a long time... It had only been when he was around the now ex-angel. Smiling again now, at Castiel's enthusiasm as he bounced out of the room, Dean took a moment to observe the way the material fell on Cas's body. The v-neck hanging around and exposing the collar bone, and a little bit of his chest, and the loose fit of the plaid shirt, still showing some muscle underneath. He watched him dance for a new shirt, and when e saw the muscle shirt adorned on him it took all his will not to let his mouth fall open. Comfortable and snug around every chord of muscle, Dean let his eyes follow the lines of Castiel, until his eyes stopped at his "V" on his lower abdomen. Dean blushed again, deeper this time and turned his face away.

Outside of the change room now, and smoothing his hands over his sides while checking himself in the mirror, Castiel thought this muscle shirt might be a bit too small for him. It hugged the curves of his torso, but at least the material was long and stretchy so it didn't ride up in the front or back. It didn't /feel/ tight at all though, so perhaps it was just the kind of shirt. He turned around to Dean, looking for his opinion and frowned when he seen the man was looking away and red-faced like before. "Dean..." He tried getting his attention. "Is this shirt supposed to fit this way? Turning in a small circle, he caught sight of his tattoo in another mirror, and couldn't help but smile at the way the wings curved over the backs of his shoulders and down his triceps. This shirt showed them off quite nicely and he liked that... Perhaps he'd get more.

Dean nodded stiffly at Castiel's question, and muttered a deep "look's good" that he wasn't sure Cas heard or not. He looked back to see Castiel admire his new tattoo. He faint half smile crossed his face and when Castiel finished the shirts they separated the ones that he liked and kept them in the cart. Now for jeans, he handed the pants to Cas, and there was no need for showing them off. All that mattered was that they fit functionally. When finished they walked past the shirts again, ad slowed, "want to grab any extras?"

Huffing slightly as Dean only muttered under his breath, Castiel went back into change room with his pants this time to make sure they fit. After changing back into his own clothes (technically Dean's), he came back with the clothes in his arms and set the ones he liked in the cart. On the way back to the tills, he looked back at Dean as they stopped, before selecting a couple plain black shirts. If Castiel were to be staying with the boys, his clothes were probably going to get dirty fast on the hunts. And he didn't have his grace to expel any unwanted filth anymore so he'd have to actually clean his clothes like Sam and Dean. "This is all, I think... Groceries?"

Dean simply nodded and they began wheeling towards the food. "So... What do you like? What should we cook?" He smiled at Castiel, again.

"I... Don't quite know what else I like. Other than burgers and pancakes," a hint of a smile curled up on the corner of his mouth. He didn't know what he liked, but he knew what /Dean/ liked. And as much as he wanted to keep him making a pie for Dean a secret, he had no idea where to start with the ingredients. "I want to make you an apple pie... So you can choose what you make for me. Does that sound... Agreeable?"

Dean's cheeks stained once again as he learned of Castiel's intensions of pie. "Okay" he spoke sheepishly. He flipped open his phone and wrote a note on his memo pad and gave it to Cas. "Thats all you'll need. If you get lost or confused, meet me by the meat section, okay?" He gave a soft smile as Cas wondered off. He took a breath and started gathering things for a few nights of supper. He thought tonight would fit for a nice lean beef stir fry.

Castiel took the device and eyed the list of ingredients he needed for the pie. The list wasn't long, and all the things he could carry in his arms back to the cart when they were to meet up again. "Thank you, Dean. See you then," reading the list over and over to memorize it, he stuck the device in his pocket as he went off to locate what they needed. It took him a while longer than expected to grab everything, and by the time he had it all it was getting difficult to carry because the brown sugar kept slipping and he nearly lost the butter. Hugging them tight to his chest, he shuffled hurriedly through the store until he came back to the meat section. Dean had his back to him, walking down the aisle and checking a few packages of meat. Castiel came quickly over to him and placed the objects in the cart with a heavy sigh of relief. He hadn't dropped anything.

Dean turned as he heard a clatter of things in his cart, seeing Cas roll everything from his arms he raised an eyebrow, "you got it all?" He asked rhetorically as he looked at the items and mentally confirmed that all the items had been attained, "nice job, Cas." He smiled. He had just finished getting everything he needed, too, even kitten chow and wet food. They checked out their items and left the grocery store swiftly, putting the bags in the back seat and trunk. They arrived back at the motel, and they unloaded things unceremoniously on the countertop. "Here, only give him a third of the can and only one scoop of grains on the side for now... And water." As Castiel did so, he turned on the stove and began preparing supper.

(( my chapters just seem to be getting longer and longer don't they?

Let me know if this is a bad thing or if you guys are liking longer chapters :) thanks for the continued support everyone, cheers))


	12. Chapter 12

Castiel was secretly very pleased with himself that he'd gathered all of what was required, and while standing there, he peeked in the cart to see what else Dean got. He couldn't tell what the other was going to make, but knew if Dean cooked it, it must be good. It didn't take long after that to check out and get back to the motel and unload. Taking the kitten food, he put it in Gabriel's dish following Dean's instructions, before cleaning out the box that he'd neglected to take care of before they left. "Taking care of cats is tedious work..." He said to Gabriel, laying the fresh papers in the bottom and scratching the cat's head as he ate. He liked the little things that would keep him busy. Washing up in the bathroom before coming back out again, Castiel came to stand behind Dean, peering over his shoulder as he prepared the meal. "Is there any way I can assist...?"

Dean grinned widely, "Cas, don't you worry about supper, I want you to relax and enjoy it okay? Maybe watch another movie while you wait, your pick" he nodded his head toward the pile of rented vhs's. Dean fully enjoyed cooking and seeing the happiness and enjoyment on other's faces, just like Sam's back at the bunker... "Are you okay with baking the pie tomorrow?" Even though Dean never passed on pie, he thought eating a full home-cooked meal would fill his belly, as it was. He finished the dish quickly and brought it to the joined beds. Steaming platters of a few carrots, shredded beef, and tangy brown sauce on top of white rice. "Bon appetite" he handed Castiel his plate. He waited anxiously for the first bite, and as the fork entered Castiel's mouth he leaned forward to await his reaction.

Castiel smiled softly back at him, and nodded once. He understood that the man wanted to cook on his own, and perhaps he should take the time to look up how he was going to make Dean's pie on the Internet. He still had his cellular device in his pocket, so while he popped in Lilo and Stitch, he looked up recipes online and glanced between the two screens occasionally. Eventually he got too distracted by the movie, and the smell of food in the air to continue looking on the Internet. Stomach snarling as if he'd been starved for days, Castiel smacked it as if it would listen. He didn't like it when his stomach spoke. It was embarrassing. Reaching up to take his plate finally, heat rose into his cheeks as he thanked Dean for the meal. Taking his first bite of a piece of meat, mixed with the rice and sauce, his eyes closed and he hummed around the fork appreciatively. "Mmmm~... It's... Delicious,"

A large grin snaked across his face as he watched the pleasure of food plastered all over Castiel's face and voice. "Good i'm glad you like it." He put a forkful in his own mouth, and as he tasted his own creation he moaned loudly into his food, damn he was good. He finished his plate at an average speed, taking time to enjoy a home cooked meal. He looked over often to watch Castiel stuff food in his cheeks, and when he finished he took both plates to the sink and rested them in there for now. "Mmm... Man I'm full" Dean said happily an put a hand on his stomach contently. He sat on the bed with Cas, and he closed his eyes as he rested his head and back on the wall.

While eating, before long, Gabriel climbed up onto the bed. It was interesting, watching the kitten sticking his claws into the material of the blanket to haul himself up. Black tail sticking up, he trotted over to Castiel and mewed at the plate in the ex-angel's hands. Castiel frowned and moved the plate away from him. "Mine..." He grumbled, lifting another fork to his mouth. Sitting up and resting his back against the headboard, ankles crossed over each other, the kitten jumped up onto his lap and reached his paws up Castiel's chest as if begging. Caving in to those sweet green eyes, the color of peridot, he sighed and swiped up some of the sauce on his finger and offered it down to him. Looking over to Dean while the cat's small tongue licked the sauce, he almost smiled. "You make excellent food, thank you, Dean... Better than a restaurant," he admitted, taking up his fork again when the cat finished cleaning his finger. He continued to mew and paw for more but Castiel wanted to finish his dinner. When he did, he thanked Dean for taking his plate, and lifted Gabriel to hold him against his chest. He too felt full, and content. Tomorrow would definitely be a better time for pie... Perhaps he'd make it for breakfast while Dean still slept. Chuckling as Gabriel stuck his white paws on his lips, the ex angel nuzzled up against him and scratched his head.

Dean opened one eye and peered at Castiel as he snuggled the furry creature in his arms and he smiled to himself. This cat made Cas happy, and a happy Cas meant a happy Dean... Apparently... Dean opened both eyes now, and craned his head to face Cas. "Cute" he said. Though, he wasn't sure if that was meant for the cat or Castiel... The playful smile on his face made Dean stare again and lose his thoughts... Before he realized it, he had leaned closer to Cas, finding his eyes on his lips, thinking about how soft they looked and how beautifully they wore a smile. He fluttered his eyes up to meet Castiel's deep blues. "C- Cas..." He couldn't seem to read the expression on Cas's face but he felt his face rise in heat and red coloured his features.

Castiel wasn't aware of Dean watching them until the man spoke, his voice a little closer now than it was before. Lowering the kitten from his face, letting Gabriel rub up under his jaw, he cast his deep blue gaze to Dean's and blinked slowly. The hunter's eyes had shifted from Castiel's, down to the ex angel's lips, and back again... Heat rose to his cheeks almost immediately. Swallowing dryly, he noticed the red return to Dean's face too, and the tips of his ears... Was he feeling the same hot flash as Castiel? "... Dean," he answered slowly, having turned his head to face him directly. He didn't know what he was seeing in Dean's expression, but it made his stomach curl in anticipation. For what, he didn't know.

Dean couldn't stop looking at Castiel's soft pink lips but also couldn't stop looking into his blue eyes and trying to read him... He found himself even closer to Cas now... Noses only an inch apart. He felt Castiel's breath on his own wet lips, as he'd been licking them nervously. He took a small shuddering gasp in, and with his thoughts entirely disabled, he tilted his head sideways just a little, and keeping his eyes on the plush set of lips before him, he closed them only as he closed the distance between them. He gingerly placed his lips to meet Castiel's, and everything became slow motion. He took notice of every detail, the velvety feel of Castiel, the taste that lingered between their supper and his saliva. His stomach hurt, but not in a bad way... What the hell?

Castiel found himself breathing faster as Dean leaned closer, and Gabriel completely abandoned the spot on the ex-angel's chest as he began to tilt toward him too. It was almost as if they were gravitating closer... He kept watching Dean's eyes, only getting distracted when the man licked his lips. A foreign feeling spiked through him - it fanned outward through his body, consuming his body in the same heat that flooded his face. Lips parting in a gasp, before he knew it, Dean's mouth was on his. It was barely a brush, but they were warm, soft and moist... They didn't move, and Castiel's eyes widened in shock. A full-body shudder shook him, and a small noise of shock and breathlessness escaped his lips as he felt himself press back... The way those plump lips moulded against his...

Dean leaned in closer when he felt Castiel respond, and as their lips pressed harder against each other, and brought a hand up, and the tips of his fingers traced Cas's jaw. Reluctantly, he pulled away slowly, and his eyes fluttered open again. The look on Castiel's face was still illegible but his heart gave a strong tug as their eyes met again. "Um..." He was lost for words. Should he apologize? Should he even say anything? /could/ he say anything? His breath was shaky, "Cas.." He tried to speak but it came out as a whisper.

Castiel completely forgot to breathe when they kissed, their lips lingering on each other's nervously. Neither of them moved, only Dean pressed down a little more firmly and reached up to touch his face. He gave a full-body shudder just before Dean pulled away, and sucked in a deep breath as they met eyes again. Castiel's were wide and stunned, jaw hanging slack, breaths puffing passed slightly parted lips... He couldn't bring himself to respond when Dean spoke. All he did was close his mouth and state at him, observing an emotion on his face he'd never seen before... Longing, affection, and worry. He couldn't hold his gaze; it was too intense and it made Castiel's heart jump frighteningly loud. Before he knew it, he'd turned over in the bed, back facing Dean. He should have said something back, but he couldn't. His voice wasn't working. Curling up on his pillows and pulling a blanket over himself, Castiel shivered again but not from cold.

Dean's heart sank hard, Castiel only looking at him and turning away. He extended an arm as if to place his hand on Cas's shoulder but pulled it away. He decided to turn over as well and huddled in the sheets and attempted to sleep. Hours later Dean had still not been able to achieve unconsciousness. He didn't move at all and when he closed his eyes he felt the lingering of the earlier kiss. Did that really happen? Why? He wasn't .. /gay/... It was just Cas... He'd only felt that way for him. Dean's thoughts scrambled all over the subject and he eventually was able to relax his mind enough to sleep about two hours before he smelled something sweet and he woke himself. "Cas?" He called out.

Curling in on himself, tucking his knees against his chest, Castiel touched his lips with one finger. Closing his eyes, he felt Dean's heat pressing against them again, the memory fresh and vivid, alive with the tingle where they touched. Licking his lips experimentally, he literally /tasted/ Dean on him. Hugging the blankets tightly over his shoulders (which were dry and sore again since he neglected to put the lotion on), he squeezed his eyes shut and replayed the last few minutes in his mind over and over again... The way he'd said Castiel's name... It made his heart wrench. Feeling the bed move behind him, he tensed slightly until Dean stilled. They weren't touching; neither of them were looking at the other. The tension in the room was so thick he could hardly breathe for a few hours until Dean fell asleep. Gabriel curled on Cas's pillow against the back of his neck, so the ex angel couldn't move... Eventually he was forced to sleep. He didn't sleep for long though. It was more like a light doze. When he woke up again he was still tired, and the sun hadn't begun to rise, but he forced himself up anyway much to Gabriel's protest. He shushed the kitten, replacing his food and water, before cleaning up and heading to the mini fridge where their groceries were kept. Dean had left his phone on the counter, so Castiel used it to look up the recipe and directions he'd found yesterday. Castiel had bought pre made pie shells, but he'd have to do the rest by scratch. This was his opportunity to make up for the awkward mess he'd made of himself last night... Just thinking of the kiss nearly made him slip while skinning the apples. Quickly, he decided thinking of last night was a bad idea when making food. He'd have time to sort his thoughts later when there wasn't a knife in his hands.

When Dean finally woke up, the sun was peeking over the horizon and in through their drawn curtains. Castiel had just lifted the pie out of the oven (shocking himself when he couldn't touch it with his bare hands, and he had to wear the mits. Luckily he'd pulled his fingers away before they could burn. They were just a little red at the tips but it wasn't so bad) and set it on a cooling rack. He grinned at his success. The pie shell was a golden colour, and the smell it gave off wafted through the room warmly. He wasn't sure if it would taste as good as it looked or smelled, but he certainly hoped so... "Good morning, Dean," he answered after a moments hesitation. He couldn't turn around and look at him just yet, so he kept focused on the pie. "... You woke up just in time."

Dean sat up and let the blanket fall off him. He rubbed one eyes with the back of his hand. "Did you... Make pie?" He asked as he analyzed the smell and the oven light on. "Dude, you're awesome". He stretched and brought himself to the washroom to wash up and wake up. When he exited Cas was still watching the pie as if it were to cool faster, but then he remembered last night, as heat stung his cheeks /again/. He realized how awkward this would be now.. He had to distract him somehow.. "Hey, you didn't put lotion on your back last night, better do it now, do you want help again?" Maybe rubbing his back with lotion would soothe his irritation... Maybe it could make it worse... The pink remained light on his face, dancing among his freckles.

Nodding at the question, the ex angel leaned on the counter a little away from the pie so he wouldn't be hovering over it. He half turned toward the bathroom when Dean exited, but he kept his eyes lowered. "I didn't think you would object to pie for breakfast, so I made it before you woke up... I had to use your device, I hope you don't mind," he slid it over the counter toward Dean. The next question made him a bit nervous again. Though he /could/ force himself to reach all the spots on his back that needed lotion, it was uncomfortable, and his shoulders were too sore for that kind of maneuvering still. After last night, he was extremely reluctant and nervous to let Dean touch him again, but... They really needed something to do so that they wouldn't be sitting in complete silence while they waited for the pie to cool. "That would be... Much appreciated, yes..." He said in a low voice, glancing up only once at how red Dean's face was. His freckles really stood out against the red of his cheeks. It was... Cute. That was the only word for it. Like glancing into Gabriel's eyes - /that/ kind of cute, that he just wanted to /hold/- no, this was /Dean/ and not a cat. Cats, he could cuddle. Hunters... Not so much.

Dean hated having something hang thickly in the air between them, especially when that something was a kiss, but he would bite his tongue for now as to not make it /more/ awkward. He took the lotion and he did his best to compose himself and not blush too Much harder when Cas removed his shirt. He swallowed and put the lotion on his back and massaged it efficiently. He washed his hands and sat quietly on the bed. All he could think about was that kiss from last night, wondering how Cas thought of it... All he knew for sure now, having meditated on it, was that he enjoyed it. There had been something he felt for Cas that was close to the way he felt for Sam, but it wasn't brotherly with Castiel. He shook his head, and tried to think about pie... His thoughts failed him as he began thinking of both the kiss and the pie... And how awesome it would be to-... Nevermind.

Moving away from the counter, Castiel pulled back a seat from the table pushed against the window, pulling his shirt over his head with some difficulty when he felt the scabs on his back tug sorely. Hugging the shirt to his chest, he ducked his chin down as the cream was lathered over his tattoo. The moisture made him sigh in relief... Never again would he skip out on putting the lotion on his back even if it meant risking putting himself in an even more awkward position than last night. Once Dean finished, Castiel put his shirt back on much easier, before returning to the pie on the counter. It was still hot, but cool enough to finally serve. Cutting it into proper slices, he put one on a plate for himself and one for Dean. Grabbing a couple forks, he brought it over to the bed and offered one to him with a half smile. "I hope you enjoy..."

Dean accepted the treat gratefully, and he waited for Cas to sit until he put a forkful in his mouth, filling his cheeks. He moaned loudly into the delicious food. The perfect blend if cinnamon and brown sugar, and the perfect softness, but not too soft, apples. He barely let himself swallow before he tried to speak "holy crap, Cas... This is amazing." Another bite "perfect" he shoveled the rest down his throat, "the best apple pie ever, thank you, Cas" he smiled in the ex-angels direction.

The first noise of approval made the corner of Castiel's mouth twitch up slightly into a hesitant smile. He didn't touch his own slice until Dean was half done his, finally taking a seat next to him and poking into it with his fork. Giving it a try for himself too, he hummed pleasantly under his breath until a full smile took over his features. For the moment, the events of the previous night were out of mind, and he could relax around the hunter again. The compliments made his blush return, just a subtle pink - it was hardly there, but Castiel was touched that Dean thought so fondly of his food. "Help yourself to as much as you would like," He said between bites, gesturing to the evenly cut pastry on the counter. "I imagine it tastes best when fresh... I... Also have ice cream in the mini fridge, if you want some... I read it goes good with pie."

"Awesome" he replied. He was still astounded that Castiel would do all this for him, especially with the events of last night. He hung his head as a blush once again betrayed him, he got up to put his plate on the countertop for now. He returned to Cas on the bed and he fidgeted with his hands, "uhm...listen.. I cant handle the awkwardness anymore... So just... I'm sorry... Bout last night..." He stuttered and paused, thinking about his words before he blurted out something stupid.

Castiel stayed on the bed as Dean stood up to return his plate on the counter, and watched as he came back. Scraping up the last bit of pie filling onto his fork, he very clearly avoided the hunter's eyes as he apologized... Licking his lips with a sigh, Castiel moved the plate off of his lap before standing up. Looking anywhere but directly into his eyes, he ended up looking over his shoulder and back to Dean's lips several times. "Don't..." He said firmly. "Do not apologize... Those are for when you truly regret an action..." Finally, sucking in a shallow breath, Castiel stared into those sincere and warm hazel eyes. His own expression was completely unreadable, but Dean looked nervous. "... I sense you don't actually regret it. And... Nor do I." Leaning in to Dean's 'personal' space, the ex angel pressed a gentle kiss to the corner of his mouth, before immediately stepping around him. He wanted to linger with his mouth on him for longer than that, but he wasn't going to risk it. He feared he might never let go. "We should go visit Sam today."

Dean listened to Cas carefully, and his heart gave a small jump of joy as Castiel said he didn't regret it. He saw Castiel come towards him and when his face got closer to his, every muscle froze, and he held his breath until Cas went behind him. Shaking, he attempted speech, "y-yeah... We should.." The stain on his cheeks inflamed and his heart swollen with foreign meaning. He managed to stand up, and he wobbled toward the counter to get more pie, and ice cream this time, " but more pie first " he said before he stuffed his cheeks again.


	13. Chapter 13

While Dean was recovering, Castiel fished around for a container. He wanted to take a piece of his first successful pie to his friend... It'd be a pleasant treat. Hopefully he was awake. Watching Dean half stumble into the kitchen area to fetch himself another piece, Castiel chuckled under his breath before leaving the container of pie on the counter for when they would leave. "Careful, Dean... Don't trip over the kitten on the way back," was that teasing? Perhaps it was... Castiel was beginning to like human emotions.

Dean rolled his eyes at Cas's joke, and he savoured his pie. After he finished another session of moaning into his food, he mumbled "let's go then" he smiled at Cas, a little food still in his mouth. He couldn't seem to not smile around his angel... Ex-angel... But Dean didn't see that part of him. He was just Cas... They headed out and drove to the hospital. Dean turned on the radio, and a slow song cane on and Dean almost changed it until he heard the words "arms of the angel" an he just turned it down a little, still audible. He secretly liked that song, it reminded him of some of the simpler days. They pulled up to the hospital now and they went straight to Sam's room, and Dean assumed his position beside his brother.

Staying in the kitchen area and leaning back against the counter with his arms folded over his chest, Castiel kept his eyes down on the floor as Dean ate. Several times the thought of reaching up to touch his lips where he'd kissed the hunter popped up, but each time he pressed it back... Had he really done that...? Of course he wanted to. He'd always had feelings for Dean... And he'd come to realize what those feelings were last night. At least some of them. The tip of the iceberg... Picking up the plastic container, he followed Dean out the door to the impala. Again a silence fell between them, and Castiel was left to ponder on his thoughts. A soft song came on the radio, and the ex-angel looked over at Dean curiously when he turned it down instead of changing it... He was so used to hearing heavy metal, the loud screeching and banging; this was truly surprising. Out of curiosity, Castiel reached for the volume and turned it back up enough to hear the lyrics. What he heard made his breath stop. Steeling his expression, Castiel sat back in his seat and gripped the edges of the container of pie. He ingrained the lyrics of the song into his head as they came, trying to breathe again without making it obvious. Looking out the window - at anything but Dean - he didn't move for the rest of the ride.

"Hey, Sammy." He brushed a string of hair out of Sam's face, and smiled at him as his eyes opened. "Heyy... How are you feeling?" He watched Cas for a moment, and then back at Sam.

Sam heard Dean's voice and he came to consciousness. "Hey, Dean" he croaked out. "I'm not any worse... But I'm not any better either... How about you guys?"

Castiel let Dean enter the room first, but followed close behind with the pie in his hands. Taking a seat on the other side of Sam as he slowly woke up, Castiel smiled at him, glad to see that he was still holding strong. "I believe we are just fine... Glad to see you are still doing well..." For the most part. He was awake and talking at least. Unfortunately he seemed quite a bit thinner now than he used to be a few weeks ago. "I made pie this morning and thought you might want some," He offered the container out to him, watching as Sam's eyes filled with fondness.

"Thanks, Castiel," Sam breathed, smiling and taking the container slowly to hold it on his lap. It nearly slipped out of his fingers, but Castiel didn't let go until he was sure he had it. "Is Dean helping you adjust to being a human? What have you two been up to?"

Dean flickered his eyes in Castiels direction but quickly repressed his first thought.. The kiss.. "Well he's all caught up to my pop culture, music, and now food. Seriously, this pie is the best." He gave a smile to both men. "Try some"

Sam raised an eyebrow at Dean, and then at Castiel. He gave his brother another strange look before he opened the box and stabbed a piece onto his fork. He examined it by looking and smelling, and then the fork entered his mouth ad as he chewed softly, as his jaw was still stiff and painful, but he couldn't repress the moan of pleasure stinging his taste buds. "Oh my god, Cas"

At the mention of pop culture, Castiel's brows furrowed together for a moment in thought. "Yes... I discovered that humans enjoy particularly sorrowful movies. And show them to children. Land Before Time and Lion King are the most distressing..." Shaking his head, the ex-angel rubbed his temple with a sigh. He still couldn't believe most human children had grown up with those movies. Looking back up at Sam as he tasted the pie, he smiled at his reaction. "I hope you like it..." From the look in the other's eye, and the sighs of pleasure, he could tell that he did. "I think I shall bake more treats, and we shall bring them to you. Cooking is rather enjoyable - especially when the results are rewarding."

Dean let out a subtle sigh of relief that Cas hadn't mentioned their kiss... "I'm making him my new pie maker" Dean half-joked, as he winked playfully at Cas. "Sammy, how long are you gonna have to stay here man?" He asked with an over dramatic frown. Trying his best to not think about the kiss or Cas...

Sam chuckled softly, just finishing his last bites of pie. The movement in his chest made his lungs itch, and suddenly he found himself being racked by a violent cough. Covering his mouth and pressing a hand over his rib cage, he coughed and coughed, diaphragm spasming. Stars in his eyes clouded his vision, so he didn't see how Castiel sat forward with alarm to help support Sam and lay him back on the pillows gently. It took a few long moments to gain his breath again, and he smiled feebly at Dean. "I-I uh... Sorry about that, I... I don't know when I'm going to be getting out of here..." And in his eyes, it could be clearly read that Sam was scared... He was scared that he wouldn't make it out of here at all...

Castiel frowned with concern, laying a palm on top of Sam's chest to feel how he breathed after the coughs had died away. His brows drew tight with sympathy and concern... "Your breathing is labored," he sighed, pulling his hand away. "I pray you get well again soon, Sam..."

Dean's heart gave painful tugs as he watched his brother cough, he closed his eyes and simply held onto Sam's hand. Doing his best to hold everything inside, which he used to be good at, he looked at Cas when he spoke, but looked away as soon as sound no longer came from him. "Sammy" was all he could mutter. What if Sam didn't make it? What if Sam became a vegetable in the hospital? What if he turned into a malevolent spirit and Dean had to hunt him? "Sammy" he choked a little on a tear that escaped his eye.

Sam tried to be strong. He wanted to /be/ strong so that his brother wouldn't worry.. So that he wouldn't hurt when he saw Sam lying weak in the hospital bed. But it was the way that his brother said his name... Almost as if it were a goodbye... His throat tightened and moisture pricked his eyes as he clung onto Dean's hand. "Dean..." He answered, lower lip trembling slightly as he watched a tear slide down his cheek. "Don't cry, Dean please... I'm- I'm going to be fine," /right/...?

The ache in Castiel's heart reflected clearly on his face as he watched Dean's expression. For the first time since he was locked in the psych ward, he found himself wanting to wrap both of them in a close embrace... If he still had his real wings, they would unfurl and close around them too, even if the humans couldn't see them... He hadn't seen the Winchester's so torn before when they weren't angry. This was just pure hopelessness in their eyes... Taking sam's other hand and squeezing his fingers, folding his other hand on top of his, the ex angel set his jaw firmly. "We mustn't lose faith. Sam /will/ make it..." He said first to Dean, before lowering his fond gaze to his friend... "You will, Sam. Trust me..."

Dean knew the doctor had been lingering in the doorway for a while, saying nothing, letting them have their moment together, but once silence filled the room, he cleared hi throat gently. Dean turned his head slowly to look at the male doctor, tall and lanky, long dark hair, with a dark expression on his face. Dean said nothing to him, but looked back at Sam. He found his voice caught in his throat, and he knew he could speak without losing himself. The look he gave Sam said /I love you/ for him, and he gave another tight squeeze to his hand he stood and began to walk slowly away. The doctor placed his hand softly on Dean's shoulder, whispering he said, "we are doing /everything/ we can..." And he let Dean walk away, and waited for the other to exit the room also. Once outside, Dean took a large breath of the fresh air, attempting to calm his body. He looked at Cas with a watery expression as he opened the door to the Impala. He turned the key and began to drive back to the motel room, he remained quiet the whole drive. Once inside, he lay on his back on the bed and closed his eyes.

Sam clung to his brother's hand for as long as he could, sighing when he knew they had to say goodbye again. The doctors had been running various tests, their charts coming up empty as to why Sam was so ill. Because of the blood he'd taken out of himself and given to Crowley, he was a little low on fluids, but they'd given him lots of water and the loss wasn't serious enough to require new blood getting pumped into him... They were at a loss, but they still had other things they wanted to try... "Later, Dean.." His eyes mirrored his brothers. Scared, but enough of that familial love shone through to give him a bit of confidence... "You should go too, Cas," he said as Dean left the room. The ex angel was still perched at his side watching the elder hunter's back as he exited. "Take care of Dean for me, will you...?" He added a small smile, squeezing Castiel's hand as he stood up.

Castiel smoothed the hair out of the way that was falling in front of Sam's face, nodding slowly. "I will. Until you are better..." He returned the smile, before releasing Sam's hand, and taking up the now empty container. "We will return. With more pie, next time." He promised, before waving farewell and heading out to the car.

The drive back to the motel was silent... Neither of them moved to flick on the radio. Their minds were too heavy with seeing Sam's state in the hospital, and how he didn't seem to be getting better at all... They both knew it. Following him into the room when they got there, not even Gabriel's excitement, ripping around the bedroom energetically made him feel any better. He bent down to scratch his head when the kitten bolted by, but Gabriel's focus was on attacking everything that dangled, including Castiel's trenchcoat which was hung by the door. Looking up at Dean again, he frowned sorrowfully as the man curled up on the bed, not making another sound. "Dean..." He breathed softy, kicking off his shoes and heading toward the bed. He wasn't good at this whole comforting thing... But for him, he would try.

Dean's eyes remained closed as e brought his hands to rest behind his head, still not making a sound. Dean was scared to speak, incase he would cry, and he couldn't... He had to be strong for Cas... Just like Cas tried to be strong for Dean... He shook his head side to side silently, but he opened his eyes, finally, to look at Cas. It was only a few seconds before he closed his eyes again, and he felt movement beside him but did not pay mind to it now. He figured it was probably just Gabe.

Castiel's mouth went dry as Dean looked down at him. He was standing at the foot of the bed now, looking over him... The hunter was trying so hard to keep his face calm, expressionless... But in his eyes, even Castiel could see the pain hidden deep within. Not saying another word as Dean closed his eyes and let his head drop back in his hands, the ex angel moved to the side of the bed before carefully crawling up beside him, trying not to jostle the bed with his movements. He sat next to him, crossing his legs, before gingerly reaching out to touch Dean's elbow. He wanted to say something, or /do/ something - /anything/ - to lessen the hurt that was rolling off of him in waves. But no words came... Castiel was at a loss. He'd never been good at this 'comfort' thing, and the one time his friend needed it most, he couldn't provide... He didn't know what to do.

After the movement stilled he could sense Castiel was next to him. He peeked an eye open to see where he was and he found himself looking at his crossed legged lap. He closed his eyes and extended a hand to one of Cas's knees to guide himself, and he curled himself over, head landing comfortably in Castiel's lap. He let a few silent tears fall from his eyes onto the jeans, and he curled himself tighter against Cas, fetal position now, arms hugged around one of Cas's bent legs. He tried to breathe but a small hiccup noise came from his throat, and he closed his mouth and buried his face into Castiel's soft abdomen. He breathed Cas's name into his belly, as more soft tears dripped from him.

Watching as Dean moved himself to curl against him, Castiel blinked as tears began to streak down his cheeks. He didn't mind as the drops landed on his jeans. For a long minute he didn't know what to do, with the broken man sobbing on his lap, who pushed himself closer to press his face into Castiel's stomach. Once he was there, his arms automatically curled themselves around his shoulders, one hand cradling the back of his head and holding him near, but not so tightly that Dean would suffocate in his shirt. "/Oh, Dean/..." He breathed, hunching down to nuzzle into his hair affectionately. His heart was beating erratically now, simply /aching/ for his hunter... He would have given anything to make Sam better, if only to see them happy and together again like brothers should be... But mostly, he just wanted to see Dean smile again. Slowly, Castiel began pressing kisses to the side of Dean's head... One... Two... In between, both of his hands stroked the back of his head, and one moved to rub between his shoulder blades... The third kiss landed on his temple. Dean's hiccup made his heart flutter again, and it was only then did he notice his own eyes were beginning to water, blurring his vision. He closed them, and continued pressing those delicate kisses to wherever he could reach with his mouth and still breathe.

Dean sobbed a little harder as he felt Castiel's lips on him, he stayed that way fir a little while, letting Cas kiss wherever he could, but after quite some time, he did his best to clean his face off on his own sleeve, he turned on his back, head still in Cas's lap. He started into Cas's eyes for a little while and let a couple more small tears fall to the side of his face. He gave Cas a small half smile, and brought his hands up to clasp his face and brought him down to his salty lips. The kiss was slick with Dean and Cas's tears, and it was gentle and soft. Dean's heart swelled with all sorts of feelings he wasn't familiar with.

Castiel sat up just a few inches, enough for Dean to turn himself around and they wouldn't bump each other in the process. The ex angel's hands returned to Dean's head, cradling his face and tracing his fingertips along his jaw while the man looked up at him. With his thumbs he wiped away the tears that fell from the sides of his eyes, while his own fell unbridled onto Dean's cheeks. He wiped those away too, before closing his eyes and sinking down into the kiss, guided by Dean's touch. This was nothing like their first kiss... For one, Dean was upsidedown to him, so instead of brushing noses, Dean's chin was beneath his nose and he could feel the other's on his too. Neither of them stiffened, nor pulled away... Each only let the kiss linger, and deepen. It was long, slow, and intimate... Wet with tears, and their own saliva... Softly, Castiel began humming a tune under his breath. Something warm and soothing... Vaguely familiar, too. He kept humming the tune, stroking Dean's cheek, with careful motions, until he recalled the name... /In the Arms of an Angel/. He'd heard it in the car before... It was ironic, how it was this song was the one to come to mind first. He didn't yet have the lyrics memorized, but the tune was certainly fitting for the moment.


	14. Chapter 14

Dean felt the low vibration of Castiel's humming, and it sounded familiar... But he didn't quite recognize it. It sounded nice an it calmed him, and he liked the feel of everything that was Cas in that moment. He separated his lips for only a moment to peer at Catiel's face again, and looking at it, he couldn't keep to himself. He brought him in for another tender kiss, he caressed his face, feeling the stubble that was barely there. He hummed his own noise into the kiss, a content sound. "Hmmm"

Castiel's eyes didn't open again until Dean pulled them back, and he finally looked down to see the almost serene expression gracing the hunter's face... He looked almost as relaxed now as he did when he was asleep. Corners of his mouth tugging upward, still humming the tune just as gentle and sweet as before, he gave Dean a smile. Just a small one, but it was there... Leaning his cheek into Dean's hand, he lowered himself once more as he was tugged down for another kiss. The tune he was humming eventually faded off the more they kissed, his head beginning to swim with the power of human emotion and the tingles running down his spine.

Dean found this kiss to have more spark into it... Making separate from Cas one more time, only to sit himself up, and become more accessible. He supported himself on his hands and knees, leaning into Cas's mouth. He didn't push him, but he insisted on him, licking Cas's bottom lip asking for entry, though he wasn't sure Cas would understand the hint. He raised an arm to bring around Cas's back and pressed him closer. "Hmmm" he hummed again.

When Dean moved up off of his lap, Castiel licked his lips subtly, tasting Dean on him... Not just the tears - for the most part, they had gone away - but it was the same taste of him he'd gotten the night before and this morning. As the man sat up, he straightened his legs, hating the pins-and-needles feeling because he was sitting in one position for too long. Dean was knelt between his knees, and for the moment, there was a larger space in between them until the hunter leaned in and caught his mouth again. Humming contently at the contact, he let himself get drawn forward into his arms. Lifting a hand to Dean's cheek, he let out a shaky breath across their lips as his parted instinctively.

Dean let his tongue roam past the parted lips into Castiel's mouth and he gently introduced himself to it. After he found himself familiar moving with Castiel's inexperienced tongue, he began to push Cas on his back on the bed, clasping his mouth almost seamlessly against Castiel. Once straddled on him he moved a hand down Cas's neck, over his collarbone, and landed on his chest.

Castiel, too blissed out from the breath-stealing kisses and the taste of Dean's tongue curling around his own, laid back easily under Dean's hand. There was no tension in his body when their lips melded together anymore... The weight on his lap made Castiel grunt, though not in an unpleasant way. The tingling in his spine fanned out over the rest of the nerves in his body, swimming through his veins in a way that /should/ have alarmed him. The only thing that kept him calm was feeling /Dean/ invading every inch of his mouth while he kissed back sloppily, trying to learn how to kiss /him/ like this... His breaths deepened, coming faster when the man's hand rested on his chest. Castiel's fingers gripped his shirt just above the hips, trying to station himself.

Dean roamed a hand around Castiel's body, not putting too much weight on him as to not hurt his tattoo. He separated his mouth again to press his lips to his clavicle and on all accessible sides of his neck. He fell a little to the side of Cas, one leg intertwined in between Cas's legs, and still kissing his neck, his hand found itself at Castiel's crotch. Dean became much too distracted by the breathy sounds beside him to even fully notice what he had begun to do. He put a light pressure to the slight hardness that his palm fell over, and found himself palming at Castiel. Nipping at his neck now, he began to feel his own pants tighten, and the sound of quick breath coming from him, too. The other wandered its way, at some point, into Castiel's hair, and Dean made a fist in it, but wasn't pulling.

Hands dragging up Dean's sides to sink into his hair, heart pounding when the man's lips found his collar bone, a shiver racked his body. Tipping his head back, the tingling flaring under Dean's kisses to his neck, he made a choked noise when the hunter's hand slid over the front of his pants. Face flushing red, and feeling the tips of his ears burning in the heat, he whimpered and gasped sharply as sparks of pleasure and /need/ shot up from the fork of his legs. It coiled in the pit of his stomach and made his entire body squirm. His vessel's old memories identified this as arousal - he'd felt it only once before, when he was an angel and watching the certain video he wasn't supposed to talk about... But that felt /nothing/ like this. It ached, and swelled with blood too fast under Dean's touch. Biting his lower lip and choking out gasps, his fingers tightened in Dean's hair as his body arched up under his touch. "D-Dean-!"

Dean gasped when the fingers wove in his hair tightly but it wasn't painful, it only urged him to look and watch the expressions move on Cas's face. Stunned by the beauty of it all, he pressed a little harder and moved a little faster. When he heard his name called in such a tone in Castiel's voice, he bit his lip hard, and continued to watch the ex-angel's face in pure wonder. His own pants had become unbearably tight, and with his own pelvis pressed to Cas's hip he rubbed himself only a little against the other warm body. "Casss" he breathed, almost hissing at the end. This was one of the most amazing experiences of his life and no one even had their pants off. Feeling the rough friction of the jeans only heating it up, he mouth fell open in a gape and his breath became moans. He couldn't control himself. He found himself grinding against Cas with the same momentum as he palmed him. He took his eyes off of the ex angel and let his breath fall on Cas's neck. "Ah~..nng" he tried to keep his noises inside, but the feeling of /everything/ was too strong. He could feel the wetness of his precum in his boxers, and he also knew it wouldn't be long now..

"Dea-/aaAAH~/!" Mouth falling wide open under the stimulation and panting heavily, his hips jerked uncontrollably up into the hand groping him, the stinging in his shoulders only /adding/ to this strange pleasure. He hated the tightness of the jeans, but so long as Dean kept touching him like that it was bearable. His penis twitched, fluids dampening the front of his pants, but he had not yet reached completion... It wasn't until Dean's body began rocking against him /fully/ that the ex angel absolutely lost it. His suppressed noises turned into loud, desperate whines, digging his fingers down into Dean's shoulder, hard. He could feel the man breathing on his neck, and the way he dragged out his name..."DEAN~!" He cried out desperately, grinding himself against the man's thigh and hip for the extra flames of pleasure licking through his nerves when the groping hand finally brought him to the brink. White noise exploded behind closed eyes, a deep, guttural groan of satisfaction ripping its way up his throat. He could feel the fluids pumping out of him in little waves, each one making a wider stain in the front of his jeans. Eyes flying open at the sensation, he whipped a hand up to cover his mouth as he gasped in shock at what they'd just done.

Dean only could grind harder every time his name got louder, but he could tell very easily when Castiel had reached his climax, and as a gentleman he eased off him, as difficult as it was because he was so close. He looked at Cas had his hand covered his mouth and Dean smiled to himself. Though this might take Castiel a little while to wrap around his head, Dean was secretly happy to have given Cas that first experience. He just hoped that he wouldn't hate him or anything after this, if he thought the kiss was awkward... He said nothing as he backed off Cas after planting a quick and soft kiss to his collarbone. He just watched Castiel and waited for something to happen.

Breathing hard through his nose as Dean backed off him, his entire body trembling with aftershocks of his release, he looked down at the hunter with a wide-eyed, red faced expression. He wanted to ask what just happened... How did it get so far, so fast? And why did he want /more/...? But he couldn't say a single thing after that. Instead, he shivered again under another kiss to his neck, letting out a sigh, almost another whimper before forcing himself away. Untangling his limbs from Dean, lowering his hand from his mouth to cover his crotch instead, moisture pricked at the corners of his eyes in embarassment. "E-excuse me... A moment..." He panted, frantically trying to sit up and force himself off the bed. His legs felt like jello - at first he fell straight to all fours, but the ex-angel quickly picked himself up off the floor and stumbled clumsily off to the bathroom. Was that supposed to happen like that? He didn't see any wetness on Dean's jeans... Shutting the bathroom door and locking it behind him, he dropped back against it and slid to the floor in a heap as he tried to wrap his mind around what just happened.

Dean let Cas stumble around, holding in a laugh when he fell. As soon as the bathroom door closed, Dean had his hands on himself, he got way to close to worry about Cas right now, because right now, Dean needed release. He slipped his hand below his belt and pumped himself efficiently. Closing his eyes as he heard Cas's voice screaming his name in the back of his head, he tightened his grip slightly, letting his lips part, and quiet breathy moans escape them. He bit his bottom lips as he felt himself gettin close again, and then just the right tug, and a low, satisfied grunt came from his core as he spasmed over himself. He lay there for a moment, taking his hand away, wiping some of the cum off with nearby tissues, but he made no move to change. It felt strange and sort of silly, but he wanted Cas to see his soiled pants... So maybe he wouldn't feel so embarrassed. Show Cas that it was okay. He let the last few minutes run in his mind as he waited for the washroom to be free for his own cleaning.

It took him a few minutes, but eventually Castiel pulled himself up off the floor. His muscles still hadn't stopped trembling, and the stickiness in his pants was becoming beyond unbearable. Stripping his clothes, he checked himself once in the mirror, blushing furiously at a couple red marks on his neck where he knew Dean had bit at his skin... He could still feel those teeth overriding his senses. Touching the marks and lingering on them, he bit down on the inside of his cheek before turning on the shower and stepping in. He must have set a record for the fastest shower in his human existence - he was in and out, after scrubbing down every inch of his body with soap. Vaguely he wished it was Dean's hands touching him again... But it was those thoughts that drove him quickly out of the shower. The total time he spent in the bathroom came to around fifteen minutes. Exiting the shower, and wrapping himself in a towel, Castiel walked out of the bathroom cautiously. His eyes found Dean almost immediately, and his jaw dropped open when he seen the wet mess in the man's lap too. Face lighting up again, he cleared his throat before searching the nearby bags for a change of clothes. He grabbed a new pair of boxers, his baggy sweat pants, and a white v-neck tee. He said nothing as he went to sit on the edge of the bed opposite of Dean, pulling on his boxers without even lowering the towel or looking at him again.

Dean just watched Cas for a moment, and then quietly shuffled to the washroom. It didnt take him long to clean up, and come back to the bed. Dean began to become worried, Cas still hadn't said anything to him. "Cas?" He asked nervously.

When Dean came back from the bathroom, the ex-angel was fully dressed in his comfortable new clothing. He was laid back with the pillows beneath his lower back, shoulders resting against the headboard even though his tattoo was now mostly bare. It was still sore, but now it wasn't so bad - only a little dry, after his shower. Twiddling his thumbs, Gabriel swatting at them from his perch on Castiel's knees. Looking up at him as he said his name, blush creeped up into his cheeks. "... Yes, Dean?"

Dean realized he didn't know what to say... "Uh..." He ran through a thousand things in his head and all he could mutter was "i... Dont know..." He blushed deeply. He wanted to say something like, 'that was fun' or 'how was that?' But his mind didn't make his mouth move. He only shuffled himself closer to Cas's side again, watching Gabriel swat at his hands. He took in a breath and it turned into a sigh in its own, he wasn't sure about the ex-angel's thoughts of their actions not long ago, but he knew he, himself enjoyed it, and considering everything... He knew Cas had enjoyed it, too, if only in the moment.

Although Castiel didn't know what Dean wanted to say, he wagered a guess that it was about their previous activities. The look on his face and the awkward posture gave that much away... Not that he blamed him. It was the only thing Castiel could think about too, even though he really tried not to. A silence fell between them again when the hunter came closer, Gabriel diving off his lap and hiding behind his thigh, peering up over the baggy grey sweatpants with pupils blown wide as he watched Dean. The ex angel realized that the kitten was 'stalking' him, and it brought a slight smile to his face. Without looking up at him, Castiel scratched behind the cat's ear. "I'm... Sorry I fled so quickly... I was embarrassed."

Dean smiled at that. Knowing Cas got flustered about Dean made something happen in his chest and he rested a hand on Cas's forearm. Contact with the ex-angel made him happy. "Next time, don't worry about it." He put a very small amount of emphasis on 'next time' to see if Cas would catch him. He tilted his head towards him and rested it on Castiel's shoulder. "That was pretty fun, though, gotta tell ya" he laughed. It was highly satisfactory to see the contorted faces of pleasure and the squirming body underneath a foreign touch delivering a foreign feeling.

Next time. Those words rung a bell in his head. Heat began creeping up his neck, into his face again, and it was then that he half wondered if blushing too much could make someone's face stay permanently red. Swallowing, he finally looked over at Dean as he laid his head on his shoulder... He couldn't avoid looking at him forever, after all. Castiel was human now - and he was greedy, in the sense that he couldn't get enough of watching this hunter. Turning his mouth and nose into the man's hair, closing his eyes as Gabriel pounced over their laps to attack Dean's hand, he hummed in amusement. The scent of shampoo, and something distinctly /Dean/ filled his nose... It was a wonderful smell. One that he would also never tire of. "Yes... It- it was... /Fun/..." he tried the word awkwardly. "...Thank you."

Dean laughed a little at the thanks, but said nothing. He closed his eyes and began to feel the relaxation of sleep crawl over his body. He curled into a ball once more and his head rested on Castiel's stomach, and he let the sleep fall over him. He was content here...

As Dean began falling asleep, Castiel was starting to feel it too. It had been a long, exhausting day... He was too tired to even wake up Dean and request lotioning his back. He didn't mind though. It was feeling better now than it did the other night, so he'd be fine. Curling his arms around Dean, almost happily when the man got comfy laying half on top of him, he slowly stroked his hair to ease him deep into sleep. Gabriel soon lost interest in the 'toy' that wouldn't fight back, and crawled away in search of something else to terrorize. Castiel made a mental note to not move his feet for the remainder of the night. Closing his eyes and sinking back against the headboard, he let his fingers drift through Dean's hair, over... And over... Until he allowed himself to ease into sleep... He was starting to enjoy being human, if only just a little bit.


	15. Chapter 15

As only a few days passed, things were pretty normal, nothing happened except for watching Cas munch on burgers for breakfast, and secretly (or maybe it was more obvious than he thought) wanting to have his hands roaming every bit of Castiel. But today was the new release of the new X-Men: Wolverine, and Dean would be damned to miss that. "We're gonna go to a movie !" Dean exclaimed happily at Cas, who had his mouth full of foam from toothpaste. Dean bounced around for the entire uneventful day, until evening, that was, and then it was just chaos. Glee screeching through Dean's energy, a childish smile looking down at Cas. They got their tickets in advance, so they went straight to the food, "popcorn, Cas?" He asked.

Castiel stared at his tired reflection, eyeing the dark stubble along his jaw distastefully. He wanted to shave it, but was nervous of nicking the skin again. When Dean entered the bathroom, Castiel flashed him a small smile through the foamy toothpaste before spitting it in the sink. Rinsing his mouth and wiping off with a cloth, he readied himself quickly to leave. He didn't know what all the hype was about for a movie, but if it made Dean happy and /this/ excited, it couldn't be bad.

Once there and standing in line for food, he blinked up at the menu and nodded. The smell of fresh buttered popcorn made his mouth water and stomach growl loudly. "Yes... Popcorn. And sweet potato fries..?"

Dean smiled, "anything you want, babe" he winked, and the guy behind the counter gave them a strange look, but took their order and thanked them as any other customers. They had gotten there just in time, the theatre was half empty still and Dean lead them to the perfect seat, middle row in the middle seats, and shortly after, the theatre was packed with people. He pointed at some people who had cosplayed for the movie, "we should do that some time" he laughed. The lights dimmed and Dean was at full attention, even though it was just the previews, he lifted the armrest that was between them and scooched closer to Cas.

Castiel blushed and cast Dean a look as he was called 'babe', but made no comment as he took the snacks off of the counter. When they got their seats, the ex angel stared up at the huge screen curiously. Currently the only thing playing were the advertisements, but excitement was pooling throughout the room as other people poured in. He almost didn't notice when Dean lifted the arm rest between them to move closer. Placing the popcorn and fries between his knees to hold them, Castiel leaned his shoulder into Dean almost instinctively... This felt nice. And he didn't care if anyone stared at them. The room was dark enough for no one to see very much anyway.

The movie started with the Marvel comics roll, and Dean smiled with joy, and his eyes sought Cas's hand quickly. Once he spotted it, his own hand immediately intertwined with his. They both held their snacks between their legs so they could munch with their free hands. Dean occasionally jumped and fangirled at a few scenes, and making eye contact with Cas. Eventually, the movie ended, and the credits began to roll, and half the people left, but Dean knew better, and he felt sorry for those who didn't know. This was a Marvel movie, you never leave during the credits. He looked at Cas, who seemed to be a little confused about other leaving but they did not.

Dean's hand on his was warm, the touch comforting. He smiled over at him while the movie began to play, until the scenes began to pique his interest. It was strange and interesting, this whole new world with people and 'mutants' living amongst them... But it was sometimes hard to focus on it when was getting excited beside him. He occasionally watched Dean, smiling when a scene would make the hunter's face light up. If they both weren't so busy stuffing themselves with food, Castiel would have very much liked to have kiss him again. As the film reached its close, the ex angel watched as other people began to leave, and was about to stand up and follow them out when Dean tugged him to sit back down. Furrowing his brows and looking back at him, Castiel tilted his head at him. "Dean... Is the movie not over?"

Dean's smile creased his eyes and lifted his ears. "You never leave during the credits in a Marvel movie, have I taught you nothing?" Dean teased a little. The lights dimmed again, and Dean's face said 'told ya' and an extra credits scene rolled. Of course, it had nothing to do with the story or the next movie, but Dean gave a good laugh at the 30 second clip. They left then, threw out their trash and rolled back to the motel. "Did you like it? I forgot to make you watch all the other X-Men movies.." He made a mental note to rent those, but right now he wanted to wash up. He shaved quickly, brushed his teeth and washed his face. He came out refreshed, "brand /spankin'/ new" he smirked. Dean joined Castiel on the conjoined beds, he lay on his back with his hands behind his head and he closed his eyes with a content and happy sigh.

Castiel quieted and settled back into his seat until the very last scene. He too cracked a smile, and even chuckled until it finished. Rising out of his seat and stretching, he followed Dean out to the car, keeping what was left of his sweet potatoes to snack on. He had them finished when they parked in front of the motel, and found himself feeling very full. "I did find it enjoyable, Dean... I would like to watch the others in proper sequence," he went straight to the bedside table when they went in, searching for the cream for his tattoo while Dean was in the bathroom. They'd been keeping up with it quite well for the last few days, but now the tattoo was becoming itchy where his scabs were. He was advised not to pick or scratch them, so he hadn't. When Dean came out of the bathroom, Castiel already had his shirt off and was laying face down in the pillows with his arms folded under his head. It looked like his wings were spread wide like this - almost majestic... "Dean, could you help with this...?" He almost didn't have to ask anymore. It was just something that became part of their routine in the past week and a half... And he rather enjoyed it, secretly wishing this hour would roll around faster during the day. Dean was always so gentle when touching his back where his true wings used to be...

Dean straddled Cas's back side and massaged the lotion carefully into the tattoo, feeling the muscles roll beneath his hands. He could never get enough of caressing Castiel's body, and it always made him a little sad to be finished the tattoo. He finished, but instead of rolling off as usual, he put more lotion in his hand and began to massage more of Cas, starting at his neck and down his spine, all the way down to his pant line. He slid himself down on Cas's legs to give him some room, "Cas, turn over" and as he did, he straddled the man's hips. He looked down affectionately, and smiled at Cas's face, "hey" he half-whispered as he stroked Castiel's collarbone, staring into his eyes.

Burying his face into the pillow with a sigh as Dean's weight settled itself on his lower back, which was surprisingly comfortable considering, Castiel closed his eyes as the cold lotion touched his tattoo. The way Dean's hands worked so easily on it had the ex angel relax immediately and roll his shoulder blades up into the touch. He took his sweet time, which he was more than alright with, even letting out a small groan - almost inaudible when voiced into the pillow - as Dean continued massaging up his neck and down his back. The man's fingers slid easily down his skin, sending familiar tingles into his nerves which collected in the pit of his stomach the lower Dean went. Oh how he wanted to arch up into the touch... But Dean's next request wasn't to be ignored. Releasing his pillow and turning around slowly underneath him, Castiel blushed again as Dean seated himself on his hips. The sensation made that feeling in his stomach intensify, and the pressure of Dean sitting on his lap made him want to squirm. Of course he didn't, because he was trying to make his situation less noticeable. "... Hello Dean," he answered after a moments hesitation, before letting his hands rest on the man's knees.

Dean had used all the lotion on his hands on Cas's back, and his hands were smooth as he brought the back of his hand down Cas's chest and let it rest comfortably in the hollow of his chest. He brought the other hand up and held Castiel's side for a moment, and then smoothed it over Cas's stomach. He let out a sigh, he wanted to kiss him but he couldn't stop looking at his form, underneath his touch, almost quivering. He proceeded with a hand to the V just above his pants, nervously, and he let his hand hover that area for a moment as he bent down and rested the other elbow by Castiel's head and stroked his hair lightly. The feeling of his warm breath and their warm bodies pressed together... He leaned into his mouth and lovingly moved his lips against the other's. he couldn't stop thinking about just how.. /beautiful/ Castiel actually was.. He hummed into their wet kiss.

Castiel tried to keep his breathing fairly even. The way Dean proceeded to touch him made it difficult, especially when the little hairs all over his body began to stand on end. The hunter's hands felt /too/ good, especially when one glided smoothly over his sensitive side and hips to hover in the front. His stomach muscles rippled nervously, until a hand came up to sink into his hair. Leaning his head into the touch, eyes half lidded as Dean leaned down over top of him, Castiel lifted his head expectantly into the kiss as soon as Dean was within reach. He caved so easily to his body's desires now - they hadn't done anything other than sneak the occasional kiss here and there after the first time Dean palmed him through his pants, but somehow it was hard /not/ to think of the man doing it again... After all, he /had/ said there would be a next time, so Castiel kept getting worked up whenever he was touched even if it was only a little. Only Dean could make him feel this way... Sliding his hands up slowly to Dean's hips, gripping his sides to keep him there, Castiel's kisses grew a little longer... A little deeper...

Dean felt fire rise in him, his blood rushing all over his body, including the pressure that was now in his pelvis. He moved his hips slowly against Cas's own, and low groan rippled through his throat into their kiss. He had never felt this was before, and it was still so new, and it was with his angel... Always his angel... He pressed his mouth harder to Cas, his tongue mingling with his a little more desperately as his hips maintained the very slow and subtle movement. He moved his wet kisses to Cas's jaw and under his chin, not minding the small amount of stubble there. He supported himself with his other hand pressed on Cas's hip bone and pinned him down. Every touch was still gentle and still careful, that it was driving himself insane,, he wanted to press him and grind against him but he held himself back, make it last.

The motion of Dean's hips sliding against his own made Castiel's pulse spike. He could feel his heart pounding in his breast, and every beat made the coiled feeling in his stomach pulse with /want/. Digging his fingers into Dean's hips, body tensing beneath the hunters, soft keening noises whined their way out of his mouth around Dean's tongue. His mouth fell open a little wider to grant the hunter greater access, shyly adding his own tongue to the tango even though he still had much to learn about kissing... But the only way to learn how to kiss was by trial and error - mainly he just mirrored Dean and tried what felt good. He couldn't breathe when Dean's mouth covered his... He completely forgot how to, with his mind so clouded. When the other's mouth moved to his jaw and neck, the ex angel gasped for breath and jerked his hips up against him once. The other's slow movements and the harsh grind of jeans and boxers against his erection were making him see stars. "A-Aahh~... D-Dean... I... I feel-..."

The hands on his hips made it harder for him to hold himself back, another low growl escaping him. When Castiel responded to his lips on his neck he pressed back a little harder. He fluttered his eyes open when he spoke, "what, Cas?.. Tell me what you feel, what you want... Anything" he barely whispered, his breath soft on Cas's cheek. He planted a very soft kiss to the cheek, and then he brought his face up to his, making insistent eye contact, to hear Castiel's words.

Castiel squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, breathing heavy with anticipation. He hugged Dean's body close to him, trying not to roll his hips into his again, if only so that he could speak. "P-please..." He choked out, cracking open one eye cautiously. "Please not in... Jeans... Hurts, Dean~..." It wasn't a lie. Cas's erection rubbed the inside of his jeans in all the wrong ways. And although it did get him some good friction, he really didn't like being so compressed.

Dean's mind froze, /he wants me to take his pants off?/ he gulped and fumbled about for a moment, and regained himself by rubbing himself against Cas just once more. He removed his shirt, first and then he ceased his grinding, to kiss down Cas's chest and down to his midsection. He began to play with the waist band of his jeans, and he tugged them down slowly, and once they were at his knees, he moved back up to his chest, kissing and nipping all over as he snaked a hand up to Cas's erection, still somewhat constricted by his boxers. He moved his hand up the shaft, slowly and very lightly, teasing him, feeling the muscles under him tremble. Hearing those noises come from the body under him drove him mad, and he couldn't take it any longer. He needed to touch Cas, and for Cas to touch him. He removed his hand from Cas, only to remove his own jeans and boxers, waiting a moment, taking a deep breath as he felt Castiel's eyes on him, he swiftly brought Cas's boxers down and took both the jeans and boxers off his ankles. He hovered above him for just a moment, and still looking at Castiel's face lowered himself so that their erections were squished together. The feeling rocked him so hard his head fell forward an his elbows buckled for a moment, "hah~... Cas~"

Watching Dean's reaction, almost amused when the hunter froze and stared down at him, the ex angel simply blushed and blinked a few times nervously. Had he asked too much...? Squirming under the grind of his hips again, Castiel gazed up at him lustfully as the man removed his shirt. Perhaps he hadn't asked too much after all. Sliding a palm up Dean's chest, he sucked in a breath as he swept down to mouth along Castiel's body. Pushing his hips up into his hands when Dean tugged at his pants, he groaned heartily at the combination of being freed from his jeans and the way Dean's lips and teeth moved over him. "Nnhh, D-Dean~!" He choked out, gasping as the hunter's hand travelled teasingly up his shaft. Castiel was aching hard, and twitching against his belly. This sensation was so new, and already /so/ much better than the first time they'd done something like this... Propping himself up on one elbow as Dean stopped touching him, and clinging to his back with the other, he looked down and swallowed hard as Dean undressed himself. He couldn't stop from licking his lips as the sight unveiled itself to him. He and Dean were almost the same size, but Dean was slightly thicker than Cas's own, and the head was a darker colour - the same colour as his lips, he noted ironically. His face flushed a dark red as he helped Dean kick off his pants and boxers, and finally his legs were free to wrap around his waist. Dropping back down onto the bed as Dean lowered himself to rub cocks, Castiel let out a strangled wanton noise as the pleasure took hold. Hooking his ankles around Dean's hips, tugging him down for more pressure, his fingers clawed up the hunter's back and shoulder blades, letting one slide around to cover the scar on Dean's shoulder... The one Castiel had left, raising Dean from hell. "Dean, aah~!" He was close enough to kiss again when his elbow buckled, so the ex angel took full advantage of that.

Dean meant to bite his own lip, but as Cas enveloped his mouth he bit Cas's bottom lip instead. His breath was shaky with nerves and want, he pressed his pelvis harder to Cas and moved up carefully and his breath hitched again. This was unlike anything he'd felt before, it was more profound, felt better. His cock twitched and precum seeped from him, he lifted himself slightly and slipped and arm between them and he wiped his precum and used it to slick them up a little. He wrapped his large hand around both shafts and moved his hips and his hand in unison. He positioned his hand so he could reach Castiel's slit with his thumb, and he pressed lightly and rubbed it softly. "Nngh~ ah.. Cas.." He felt so good against him, squeezing pleasure out of him. He watched Cas's face with his own half-lidded expression.

The bite to his lip made him cry out as his hips stuttered and jerked up. The sting felt so good, and he wanted him to do it again. Cas's body was so desperate for release... And the sensations burning through him only doubled in intensity when Dean's hand joined the sliding. Tossing his head into the pillows, back arching off the bed, Castiel's toes curled when he felt Dean's slick precum slide over his own cock with each pump of his hand. His own leaked out with it, allowing Dean's thumb to slide smoother over the tip. With stimulation like this overriding each and every one of his senses, he knew he wasn't going to last much longer again. "D-Dean I'm- I'm going to-... Haaahhh~!" He didn't want to be the first one to lose it again. He wanted to make sure Dean got the same amount of pleasure as he did... Leaning up again, desperate to take Dean's lips on his, he sucked it into his mouth before dragging his teeth over his lower lip like he felt done for himself earlier. He nipped and sucked, finding a rhythm with his hips to grind up and get them off faster.

Dean was losing control of himself, Cas was becoming a little dominant over their actions, and the teeth on his lip made his hips jump. "Fu-... Caaaa~ " he couldn't form full words, he was so lost in Castiel's own movements. He felt himself getting close, very close. He pushed harder and faster against Cas , "i-.. Im.." He choked on his warning and with a loud "HAH~" he came hard between their bellies, "nyahhh~ cas.." He panted against his mouth.

Too quickly, Castiel lost himself in the liquid fire enveloping his nerves. He couldn't see anymore through the stars, and finally he reminded himself to breathe when he heard his name spill from Dean's lips. He couldn't even warn Dean that he was on the edge now... Digging his blunt nails into Dean's back, he let out a whimper as the coiling in his stomach flooded through his body and /released/. Strings of sticky cum shot up through Dean's fingers, Castiel's hips still twitching as he rode out his orgasm with the hunter on top of him. Panting heavily, their mouths brushing, the ex angel's eyes fell shut... He didn't uncurl his legs from around him, but instead, held tighter. "D-Dean..." He breathed softly, trying to calm the erratic beat of his heart.

Dean fell onto Castiel, their cum mixing between them. "Cas..." He couldn't form a proper sentence, and if they weren't so sticky he'd have loved to fall asleep right then and there. His head rested at the base of Cas's throat and he sighed. He hugged what he could of Cas tightly, and gave him a peck on the lips once more as he brought himself up, strings of whiteness between them almost like glue. He stood and offered a hand, "let's go clean up" of course, he couldn't guarantee his behavior in a shower with Cas but he would do his best to behave well.

Little tremors shook Castiel's frame as the aftershocks of his orgasm rolled through him, wave after wave. He could feel the sticky heat in between their bellies, and the way his hard erection slowly became flaccid once more. This time was certainly more intense than the first time they did any fooling around... And now they were both naked. How did the situation climb so quickly, from comforting Dean, to... This? Was Dean simply looking for an escape? Something to distract him from his troubles...? The thoughts were troubling, and the ex angel had to try and force them down so he wouldn't upset himself. He was much to fond of the hunter to think that he would /use/ Castiel for something like that... The way they embraced each other chased those fears away if only for the moment, lifting his head to meet the kiss again, still a little breathless. Stroking his hand through his hair once, before letting Dean stand up, he silently wished they could have just laid there together and not have to worry about cleaning up... Wait, was this Dean's way of inviting him to clean up /with/ him? Eyeing his hand, Castiel slowly sat up and took it in his, stroking his fingers gently over Dean's palm. "... Together?" He asked, just to confirm whether or not his suspicions were correct.

Dean smiled down at him, "of course" /we just rubbed our dicks together, but we can't shower together?/ he thought to himself. He lead them to the shower, and after he turned on the water, he spun around and grabbed a shaver, for Cas. He found himself enjoying assisting him with his activities, along with every thing else they did together, things like this were like a cherry on a sundae... On a pie. He smiled to himself, but tested the water once more before he stepped in and extended his hand again to Castiel, inviting him to join. He still didn't know for sure how Cas felt about the things they did together, but he never protested, but he never said anything else either... But he would worry about that later, currently he had Castiel, covered in cum, in the shower with him. He had an ex angel to tend to.


	16. Chapter 16

Castiel rose, facing Dean for a moment with their hands still touching before Dean went off to the bathroom. He lingered behind, watching Dean leave while he thought more about these strange human rituals... Heading into the bathroom, and trying in vain to keep his eyes off of Dean's naked form when he got the water started, Castiel shuffled awkwardly on the placemat when Dean stepped in under the spray. Blushing and swallowing dryly, he took his hand again and stepped in after him... Once in, he closed the curtain behind himself so there wouldn't be a mess of water on the floor from the spray bouncing off their bodies. Staring into Dean's eyes, he blinked and let out a heavy breath he didn't know he'd been holding... Shuffling in closer, he ducked his head against Dean's clavicle and nuzzled in under his jaw. The rest of his body followed soon after to curl against him, keeping his one hand touching Dean's and the other by his side... He couldn't get enough of this warmth...

Dean closed his arms around the figure that curled into him, the warm spray on his back, he closed his eyes and hugged Castiel tight. "This is nice, Cas..." He reached over Cas to grab the shampoo, and squirted some in his hand. He loved running his hands through Castiel's dry hair, but he never felt him wet. Nothing felt nicer than to have Cas's body pressed to his, both slicked by the shower. He lathered the shampoo and massaged his scalp, he too his time doing this, and after a few minutes, he rinsed his hands but not Cas. He tipped Cas's head up at him, and he smiled timidly down, and with their faces, hair and bodies wet and warm, he planted a soft kiss to the man's lips. It felt unlike anything before. He'd had showers with girls before and he'd done stuff... But this felt like it meant something.. Something big. He placed his hand to Castiel's lower back and pressed him harder to his torso, trying to show how much he cared for him by pouring everything he had into the kiss.

A small smile fixed itself on Castiel's mouth as Dean's arms circled him, and he simply melted into the embrace. He relaxed and sagged against him as Dean began washing his hair, humming contently into his chest. Briefly he compared himself to Gabriel, and the way the kitten tilted his head into the scratches from his owners. He now understood why he did so, doing it himself with Dean and pressing his head into his hands. Eventually he cracked open his eyes and stared fondly into the hunter's. Lifting his arms and letting them drape around Dean's waist, he leaned into the kiss. His lips tasted of warm water and Dean's own flavour... Arms tightening around him, moving slow and sweetly with the kiss, inside his chest something began to well. There was a warmth building up inside... He'd felt it before, even as an angel, this feeling of affection... But as a human, all barriers to emotions were lifted and Castiel could now /feel/ and experience all the things that humans did... It took him all this time to realize that it was love. Dean made him feel /love/... He began to tremble in Dean's arms, a lump rising in his throat, constricting his breath. He wanted to cry again, but not out of pain or loss... He loved Dean. And it was beautiful... "/Dean~/..." His voice came out so small and frail, it barely sounded like his own... But with that one word, Castiel showed how deep his affections ran.

The frail voice and body beneath his arms made him hug harder. He continued to kiss him softly and gently... Lovingly. His heart swelled so much, he could swear his heart might /actually/ burst. He kissed every feature on Castiel's face, over and over, muttering "beautiful" under his breath, between kisses, "so beautiful". He couldn't believe what was happening, even though he was insure, he knew it's what he wanted. Castiel made him happy. He paused kissing him for a moment, to look back into his eyes... An ocean of love in them. His name, spoken with such richness, such meaning, almost made his knees buckle. He responded with a feeble "/Cas/" and he started kissing him again. He spin them around to rinse Cas's hair, but barely broke contact between them. Though he knew what he was feeling now... It would take him some time till the words manifested from his throat and heart to Castiel's ears. For now... This was all he needed.

The powerful emotions swelled significantly inside him as Dean called him beautiful. Hugging him tightly, and sliding a hand up his spine, Castiel nuzzled into the kisses as the warm water washed over their bodies. Lifting his other hand to cradle Dean's cheek, he swiped a thumb over his cheekbone. Looking into his eyes was like a blind man seeing the world for the first time... Their expressions mirrored each other, lost in their bliss and affection. Just from this, he knew Dean loved him too... Drawn in like the world's strongest magnets were attached to their lips, he kissed him again, melding them together over and over as they turned so that the water could stream down Castiel's back instead. He only broke off to tilt his head back into the spray, rinsing out the shampoo. Not once did he let go of Dean.

Dean was mesmerized by the water trickling down Cas's neck, collecting in the hollow of his throat for only a moment, and his eyes followed the line of water that trailed to his torso and... It almost seemed like a sculptured fountain as it trickled off his perfect form. When Cas tilted his back up, Dean snapped his own back up. Dean blushed slightly and grabbed the razor from behind him and presented it to Cas, "you're scruffy" he smiled.

Hair swept back by the flow of the water, Castiel lifted his head again once he was sure the shampoo had been rinsed properly... He blinked as Dean looked up from staring at his body. They met eyes, and Castiel watched the red fan out on Dean's face before he was presented with the razor. He eyed it and frowned slightly, "I... Could you...?" Pursing his lips, Castiel lifted a hand to touch Dean's, the one that held the razor. "I haven't quite got the hang of it yet..."

Dean smiled again, "of course". He lathered Cas's face and began the ritual once more, every bit of skin bared in front of him a sacred blessing. He finished quickly, despite being distracted by the form before him, but now he needed to clean himself up. He grabbed the shampoo bottle but found it stolen from his hand.

Castiel smiled and closed his eyes as Dean applied the shaving cream to his face, staying perfectly still as the razor was brought to his cheek and jaw. There was only one person in existence Castiel would trust with a blade, after Metatron cut his grace from his throat... And that was Dean. Dean wouldn't hurt him... It actually felt good when Dean did this for him. But of course, it was over quickly, and once he was sure he was done with the razor, Castiel turned his face under the water to wash off the excess cream. Running a hand over his face, feeling refreshed and clean, he was pleased to find no more stubble, and only smooth skin. Glancing back at the hunter, and blinking at the bottle of shampoo in his hands, Castiel grabbed for it before he could think about what he was doing. "You've done much for me..." He began, flipping up the lid and squeezing some into his palm. "Allow me to do this..." Stepping closer so that their bodies were flush together once more, Castiel lifted his hands behind Dean's head, tugging him in for a kiss while he spread the shampoo through his hair in a thick lather.

Dean melted into Cas as he massaged his head and kissed him. "Mmm" he hummed into the kiss, he brought his hands to Castiel's sides and moved his hips again. He was surprised to find his dick wasn't as limp as he thought it would be, considering they just came, but then again, Cas all wet in front of him was pretty hot. He slid a hand up to Cas's chest and moved it all over his abdomen while the other explored his back. "Mmm" he hummed again, as his hips moved on their own again, feeling the slick of the water between their bodies. Cas didn't even have to try to turn him on, and he was getting hard again.

Castiel's fingers worked through his scalp, from the beginning of his hair line, over the sides, down to the back of his head where the hair ended. He was very thorough, even though the kisses stole his breath again and made his mind foggy. The push of Dean's hips against his made him gasp. Breaking off momentarily to look between them, at the way the hunter's hands explored his body and the semi erection between his legs, he blushed and swallowed as he lifted his arms behind himself to wash off the shampoo in the spray. He returned his hands to Dean's hips, already beginning to feel his cock swell even as he turned them so Dean could rinse off now too. "Dean..." He mouthed against his lips, nuzzling into the kiss once more.

Dean tipped his head back into the spray, letting some of the water run down his face to his throat as well. He tipped it back up and a few droplets had clung to his lashes, and instead of wiping them off he let them hang as he looked back to Castiel's eyes. His erection was at a little more than half-mast by now and he could tell Cas was starting to feel it also. He ran his hand down the center of the man's back, and slowly made his way to his ass, and gave it a nice, playful squeeze. He kissed him back again, but quickly move his lips to Cas's clavicle, along his collarbone and back up his neck, this time giving a firm bite on the meat of his neck. Looking back at him again now, "mmm you taste good" he said shamelessly.

Having Dean's throat bared was the perfect opportunity for Castiel to sweep in... He didn't move boldly like he'd envisioned, but instead, nuzzled against his Adam's apple and timidly flicked his tongue over a few water droplets. The sweet taste of Dean mixed with the water and made him hum with approval. He lifted his head away as Dean righted himself to face him. Back curving under the touch of the hunter's fingers, he let out a breathy sigh as his rear was squeezed and automatically clung tighter to Dean's body. They pressed tightly together, with no room for even the water to run between them. Already his nerves were alive with arousal... Mouth falling agape and twitching his hips into Dean as those lips and teeth sealed on his collar bone, Castiel let out a little whimper... "I-I do...?"

"Delicious" Dean told him as he claimed Castiel's mouth once again, gliding his tongue along the other's. Dean thrust against Cas again, feeling them both harden with every movement. Dean wanted so badly to jack them both off right now, but patience was a virtue. He pulled away slightly from Cas, just enough to start sliding down to his erection, help him get harder a little faster.

Castiel's mouth fell open a little wider under Dean's tongue with a moan, allowing him greater access. The cock brushing against his own made him shiver, and his eyes followed Dean's hand down to their crotches. "Nnh..." He grunted, biting his lip at the touch of his hand. Almost immediately, his body reacted as if knowing that this man brought him immense pleasure when he was erect, and he craved that release... The release made him stop thinking. And the less Castiel thought, the less he would hurt. "Y-yes... Dean~..."

Dean's mouth molded together with Castiel's. his hips continued to rub against Cas, aiding in the pleasure for both of them as Dean /played/ with Castiel's erection. Moving his kisses on his cheek, he made his way to his earlobes and he lightly sucked and nibbled one.

Moving his mouth all over Cas, he licked and tasted every part of him from torso up. The water felt perfect between them, "Cas.." He whispered against his wet flesh.

Castiel clung tightly to him, panting and breathing in the steaming water vapor as stars danced behind his closed eyelids. Everywhere Dean touched him was alight with fire, the hand toying with his cock almost torturous. "D-Dean~nnhh!" He ground out, gripping his hip tightly with one hand. The other hand slid down between their bellies, groping for Dean's erection sliding against his. If Dean was going to play cruel, than so was Castiel... Blushing wildly as he touched the man's hard length, he slid his fingertips up to the crown of his head and rolled the tip under his thumb.

As he felt Castiel's hand snake it's way down to his length, his breath hitched and his heart fluttered a moment. The second he felt his hand on him his head fell forward onto Cas's shoulder, "ohh~" he gasped. "Ahh~Cas~" his hand felt so good, even better than earlier... Maybe because it was Castiel, taking that initiative, Castiel wanted to touch him. He let his mouth open on his shoulder, and bit down, "aahnnnn"

Hearing those noises coming from Dean, and knowing that it was /him/ and /his/ hand drawing them from the mans lips, made Castiel feel immensely pleased with himself. After all that Dean had done for him, and how /good/ he made him feel, this was the least he felt he could do in return. The bite to his shoulder made him cry out sharply in both surprise and ecstasy. Never had pain felt so /good/... Never had it made his cock twitch like that and drive his hips hard into Dean's, sandwiching their hands as he gave him a good firm stroke. "D-Dean... Please... C-cum with me...?"

Dean was buckling under Castiel's touch, moaning and gasping , "shit- Cas" he cursed, loving every ripple of Cas's fingers on him. "Oh Cas.. Fuck yeah" he swore again. He threw his head back, into the spray, and moved his hips up into Cas's hand, and moved his own hand on Cas at the same speed. "Ah~" he let out all the noises his body wanted to make.

Dean trembling and sagging against the ex angel made him almost fall in his state of heightened bliss. At least he had half a mind to press him hard against the cool wall for support, nudging Dean's thighs open a little more for his knee to fit in between. This new position made it easier for Castiel to jerk Dean off in time with the other's hand on him, and rub his leg against his balls for added pleasure... Plus, this ensured that it would be much harder for them to fall over when they hit climax. With his growing chorus of groans and whimpers, he knew they were both close. Panting into the crook of Dean's neck, flicking his tongue out over the skin between breaths, he thumbed the tip of Dean's cock, before squeezing his length on the way down the shaft. He repeated this process, slowly rolling his hips in time with Dean's hand seeking the blessed friction and hoping he was giving enough in return. "C-close... Dean, I'm so close~...!"

Getting pressed to the tile forcibly by Cas and being propped up by his leg only added to the pleasure of knowing Cas wanted him, too. The new friction to his scrotum made him see stars as he looked back at Cas when given the warning, wanting to watch him, them. the scene before him along with everything else sent him reeling off the edge, and he could barely choke out a warning in Cas's name. "Ca-AAH~" he slumped forward slightly, squeezing Cas's cock at the head so they could cum together like he wanted. He watched the strings of white fly between them and listened to the exasperated and satisfied gasps between them.

Castiel gripped Dean's ass cheek with one hand, hoisting his hips up while the other continued to pump the orgasm out of him. Looking down and groaning heartily as the sticky mess splashed up between them, his eyes fluttered shut. He sagged against Dean, kissing his neck and shoulder lazily, as if addicted to the feel and taste of his skin under his lips. The shower water made short work of washing their cum away, but Castiel enjoyed the feeling and rode out the afterglow still pressed together as their cocks softened. He gave Dean's one last almost affectionate stroke before lowering his knee from his scrotum. Despite the fact that the water was cooling rapidly, he didn't quite want to leave the shower just yet... He was content to lean against him and feel Dean's presence soak into everywhere they still touched. "Mmmmh~..." Sighing, he slid one hand up his back once more... "Dean~..."

When the man leaned into him he raised his arms and clasped them around Castiel's warm body. He opened his eyes as he stroked the meaningful tattoo with his thumb, suddenly deep in thought. Castiel wanted him, too. His broken ex-angel with his broken hunter... Content and happy, he half whispered , "grace or no grace, you're still my angel, Cas... Always my angel." He hugged him tighter and released him, he wanted to lay down now, with Castiel in his arms, tenderly kiss him to sleep. "Let's go to bed" he smiled gingerly.

Staying pressed against him comfortably, taking warmth and solace wrapped in Dean's arms, Castiel kept his eyes closed as the hunter traced along his tattoo. That, coupled with Dean's words, made him shiver... Emotion suddenly swelled in his chest, blocking his throat to the point of almost choking the air out of him. Arms curling around his waist tightly, clinging almost desperately to Dean, he felt tears prick his eyes for a moment... Luckily they washed away in the spray of the shower before Dean pulled them back so they could see each other's eyes. Smiling in return, both the love and pain clear on his face, he nodded once and leaned in to press a kiss to Dean's lips while reaching out to shut off the water with one hand. "Yes... Let's."

Stepping out first, he offered a towel to Cas before he dried himself off. He slipped on a clean pair of boxers and folded the towel on the counter. Waiting for Cas, he watched him shamelessly, never quenching his thirst for the sight of his bare skin. He smiled at him as they began towards the bed, Gabriel situated in the middle sleeping. "Damn cat" Dean cursed it. He was gonna sleep with Cas in his arms, regardless of a cat. Moving the cat carefully over closer to the edge of Castiel's bed. He fixed the sheets for the two of them to share, and crawled under them on his side, he extended an arm for Cas to crawl under. "'me're"

Castiel kept his eyes on Dean's body while the man's back was turned, watching with his lip between his teeth as he wrapped himself in a towel. He only wrenched his eyes away from the curve of his back and the marks Castiel left on his hips when Dean turned to hand him a towel. He stepped out for it, blushing slightly as Dean stared at /his/ body too... Running it through his hair, and messing it until it was semi dry, he patted it around the rest of himself to soak up the water, before wrapping the towel around his hips. Coming out of the bathroom to find his own clean boxers, he sat on the edge of the bed to pull them on. Castiel didn't bother with anything else, letting the towel drop away as he turned to Dean. Chuckling under his breath as Gabriel was moved, he gave the cat a scratch on the head before crawling up onto Dean's bed. He situated himself under the blankets easily, automatically rolling into Dean's embrace. Draping one arm over his side, the other sandwiched between them, he tucked his head beneath Dean's jaw to kiss his neck. Laying like this sent several questions spinning through his mind... He wanted to ask, but was afraid he wouldn't be able to find the right words. "Dean..?"

Sighing contently as Cas curled into him, he cocked his head down slightly to kiss his hair, "yeah?"

Fingers pressing into his back a little nervously, Castiel chewed the inside of his cheek for several long seconds before responding. He almost didn't want to ask... But he needed to. He needed to know what this meant for them. "Dean, are we..." Castiel swallowed dryly and moved back enough to see his eyes. He wanted to gauge his reaction, in case the other man got upset, which was a very high probability. "Are we... Boyfriends?" It was a stupid word, and Castiel hated it, but he didn't know enough about relationships to call it anything else. Face flushing red, he stared into Dean's eyes with his heart in his throat.

Dean looked at him sort of confused, he had to contemplate that... Dean, wasn't /gay/ .. it was only Cas.. 'Boyfriends' was such a teenager term... But 'Lovers' seemed a little too strong for now... He would like to have Castiel .. Belong to him, and for him to belong to Cas.. "Uh... I mean... Y-yeah.. I guesso" it came out a little harder than it was meant to.. "I- I mean... I obviously... /like/ you..." He kissed him on forehead, and somehow it eased his tension, "yeah, Cas.. You're my boyfriend." He smiled .

Castiel nearly bit through his cheek at the first sentence. Dean /guessed/ so... It wasn't- certain... The only thing that kept him from actually puncturing his cheek was that it wasn't a flat out no. And the kiss to his forehead made his heart flutter some more, easing a small amount of the worry on his mind... Before now, he didn't know if Dean felt the same for him as Castiel felt for Dean, but the look in his eyes and what came out next made him start to believe that he just might... Smiling, he curled back into him and kissed his lips for just a fleeting moment. He was Dean's boyfriend... And Castiel was his. "I like you too, Dean... Very much..." 'Like' was not the word he wanted to use, but knew it was too soon to tell him he loved him... He'd keep that for another day, perhaps after Sam got better and they no longer had to worry for his life. It would be easier on everyone.

Dean felt his heart hear a different word behind 'like', and it made him bite his lip. He chose to say nothing as he closed his eyes an let himself drift to sleep with his face buried in Cas's hair. Holding him as tightly as he could until his muscles relaxed.

Castiel melded back into him easily after that, closing his eyes and finding his comfortable spot, tucked under Dean's chin. Everywhere was warm where they touched, except for his feet, which he ended up tucking under Dean's calves, nearly chuckling as the other jerked at the touch of his cold feet. He was too sleepy now, having done so many activities today. It was time for rest...


	17. Chapter 17

He fell asleep sometime shortly after, and slept soundly for a few hours at least... A nightmare began to take root in his subconscious toward the early morning hours... Metatron laughing as he slowly cut the grace from Castiel's throat. He was strapped in the chair, forced to watch in the mirror as the essence of his very self bled out into a small vial, followed by /gushing/ streams of blood. He tried to scream... No sound came out, only gurgled noises as the blood soaked his entire body, Metatron cackling when the room went dark. The blood fountaining from Castiel's throat filled the room as he thrashed in the seat trying to break free, the hot liquid rising around his body and up to his face too rapidly. He was going to drown...

On the bed with Dean, Castiel had somehow moved away from him in his sleep. He had his hands around his own throat, squeezing tight and gasping for breath as he twisted around violently in the sheets. Several times his lips formed Dean's name, and only small choked noises escaped his throat. Tears streamed out of his closed eyes, soaking his pillow. "D-... De-... -elp... Me"

Dean's mind settled easily, but he had never been a deep sleeper. His subconscious nagged at him for the past while, he started to feel movement, and it became more and more noticeable. Soon after he began to hear feeble noises, and he forced himself up to see what the hell. He saw Castiel thrashing and crying, choking himself, trying to call Dean's name. He immediately lunged for him, grabbing his shoulders he shook him lightly, not wanting to hurt him, "Cas, i'm here!.. Im right here..shhh, it's okay" he coaxed, he lifted Castiel into his arms and hugged his head close to his chest, and began humming "hey jude". Just like Mary sung to him when he had nightmares or couldn't sleep.

At first, Castiel thought the shaking was him sinking beneath the blood, until Dean's voice jerked him into reality. Eyes flying open, vision blurry with tears, he released his throat and threw his arms around Dean with a pained gasp. The dream still haunted him even into the waking world, making him shake and sob as Metatron's laugh echoed through his head. He couldn't bring himself to say a word as he buried his face into Dean's shoulder... Only try to quiet his laboured breathing and broken sobs. The tears wouldn't stop, even when Dean's humming reached his ears... He did fall silent, however. This was how Castiel had comforted Dean, previously... Holding him close and humming a soothing tune. It loosed a flock of butterflies in his stomach, and the feeling rose through his body. Turning his face into Dean's neck, he breathed in his scent until he could no longer smell or taste the blood, and closed his eyes...

Dean continued humming until he felt Castiel slump over him, and he slowly let his voice drift off, as did Cas and himself. He ended up falling back, in his sleep, resulting with Castiel on his stomach. Luckily Cas was quiet for the remainder of the night, and he would save talking about it until Cas was ready. Dean woke before him, but instead of slipping out from under him to prepare food, he continued to lay there, and he wove his hand into his hair, and stroked him with his thumb gently.

This time when Castiel slept, it was dreamless... He made sure before drifting off that every part of him was aware that it was /Dean's/ embrace he sank into, and Metatron was not here... When he woke again, it was to a gentle hand stroking his hair. Slowly opening his eyes, he realized the 'pillow' he laid his head on was actually Dean's torso, his ear placed just below his diaphragm. The man's breathing was relaxed... Sliding a hand slowly up Dean's side, his other limbs tangled with the hunter's, lightly he touched Dean's ribs and traced his fingertips gingerly over puckered scar marks just inches from his face. When Castiel was an angel and lifted Dean from hell, all of his flesh had been made anew... But so much time had passed between then and now, Dean had collected a whole new set of marks. Not that he minded seeing them... Scars were interesting things. Each had their own story... Dean's story. "... Good morning," he croaked, throat still sore and raw from the nightmare.

Dean felt him touch his ribs and his scars, and he closed his eyes, remembering each scene behind each one touched. He lifted his head at his greeting, "hey babe" he smiled, "you alright?" He at least had to know his... Boyfriend's mental state. He sat up so he could kiss him, Cas sliding up with him, hand still in his hair.

As Dean moved to sit up, Castiel slid half off of him to prop himself up on one elbow, yawning. He didn't want to move yet, but he sensed that Dean had been awake for a little while now... "I'm... Better. I think. I did not wake up again after-..." He cut himself off there, not wanting to talk about the nightmare right away. It was troubling, that after all this time, the nightmares had decided to sneak up on him /now/. Though the initial shock of becoming a human was worn off by now too. He'd gotten used to not being able to fly himself places or exercise his old powers, by distracting himself with other things... Like kisses. Kisses were good. And the other pleasurable things he and Dean did to pass time. It left no room to think - and for that he was grateful. "Just better, I suppose..."

"Good" was all Dean said in response, he knew he needed to let Castiel tell him on his own terms. "Want breakfast? I'm thinking home-made french toast and bacon?" He kissed him again before moving to get up. Thoughts of last night worried him, and keeping himself busy would keep him from panicking.

Castiel met that brief, yet dizzying kiss with a sigh. He was glad Dean wasn't asking about last night; what he'd dreamt of... Perhaps after he'd had something to settle his stomach and his mind, he would talk about it. But for now, he was too tired to deal with the emotions it brought on. "Yes... That would be very nice..." Moving off of Dean so he could get out of bed, Castiel took advantage of his absence to curl up in his spot, still warm from Dean's body heat. Burying his face in the pillow and inhaling his sweet scent, the ex angel closed his eyes and settled back into the blankets. He wouldn't be able to fall back asleep, but for now he would just relax.

Dean began preparing the egg goop to soak the bread

In as the bacon sizzled on the pan. He looked over to find Castiel curled into a ball in the spot he was just in, "damn it, you're cute." He said mostly to himself, but it was loud enough that Castiel probably heard it, which didn't matter now anyways. They we're boyfriends. That thought gave him an idea, "hey, Cas... Do you like flowers?" He asked awkwardly, hoping Castiel wouldn't ask why.

Arms wrapped around Dean's pillow, Castiel huffed and squished it closer to himself to completely hide his face, to save himself the embarrassment of being seen while blushing. "'M not cute..." He protested, words muffled in the pillow. Staying there for a little while longer, brows furrowing in confusion at Dean's question, he finally unburied his face enough to peek out over the rise of pillows and blankets to stare at Dean's back. "... Yes. Flowers are a key component in a bee's life, to make honey... I like bees. Thus I like flowers too. Why do you ask?"

Dean blushed a vibrant red and he was grateful his back was at Cas so he couldn't see. "Uh.. Just wondering...do you... Maybe have a favourite kind?" Dean's face hurt with the redness. He began to get nervous that Cas would catch on to what he was planning. He flipped the french toast in the pan as he awaited an answer.

Pushing himself up, sitting cross legged on the bed, Castiel hugged Dean's pillow to his chest and rested his chin on top of it. The smell of food in the air had his stomach growling already. It made it a little harder to think about which flowers were his favourites... There were many on God's earth that he liked. "... Dahlias," he answered finally. "And... Lilies."

Dean smiled in response even though Castiel couldn't see him. He plopped two pieces of fluffy bread and three slices of bacon to each plate, he precut the bread and poured the perfect amount of syrup on it. Placing a fork on the side he gave a plate to Castiel, and then took his own spot next to him. Dean liked to watch Cas eat, filling his cheeks like a chipmunk, and his eyes always sparkled as if whatever he was eating was the best thing he ever had. He filled his own cheeks with a forkful of bread and a slice of bacon together. 'Dahlias and lilies' he repeated in his head. He bumped his shoulder into Cas's teasingly and after he swallowed his food, he kissed him on the cheek, full of food, and smiled at him.

Setting the pillow aside so he wouldn't make a mess on it, the ex angel took the plate gratefully and offered Dean a fond smile. "Thank you," he half whispered, throat still a little sore as he stuck the prongs of his fork into a piece of the French toast, drizzling with syrup. Once he brought it up to his mouth, he hummed and closed his eyes to savour the taste... This was his favourite thing about being human. Yes, he had decided that. Food was amazing... He only wished bowel movements weren't necessary after the food digested. "Disshh issh dewishis Dean..." He spoke through stuffed cheeks, hardly realizing when he began cramming everything into his mouth wolfishly. He only stopped when Dean kissed his puffed cheek, casting him a sidelong stare and blinking. Forcing himself to swallow what was in his mouth, he coughed momentarily until it all went down and he blushed at Dean. The smile on his face was so... Peaceful. Happy. He hadn't seen anything remotely like that on him unless Dean was asleep... It certainly was refreshing and beautiful to see while he was awake.

Dean finished his breakfast after Castiel did, but he took both plates and dumped them in the sink to wash them. After he finished washing the dishes he started fishing out some clothes. "Alright, Cas, today is your day, what do you want to do?" He said as he slipped a pair of jeans on.

When Dean leaned close enough to take Castiel's plate, the former angel swept in a little closer to press a kiss to his cheek in a small gesture of affection. Dean was his boyfriend now, after all, it'd be a crime if he didn't do /something/. Laying back on the bed for a little while longer, leaving his legs off of the bed with his feet on the floor, he stretched his arms overhead to reach for the other end of the bed when he heard the unmistakeable clawing noises of Gabriel climbing the blankets. The kitten was up and about seeking attention. Naturally Castiel obliged, stroking his head and back without having to look up at him. It was then that he decided to get up as well to check on his food and water situation. Without getting dressed, he added fresh food to the bowl, and went about changing his water and the litter box for good measure. Turning back around to watch Dean dress, and half smiling as he felt the cat curl around his ankles, Castiel folded his arms in thought... They hadn't looked for cases since being here. Nor had they been making any money - they'd been /spending/ it all. And if Castiel was going to do his share around here, he needed to learn how to make money and hunt as a human... He'd start learning one at a time. "I'd like you to... Teach me how to hunt..."

Dean paused with his shirt just above his head, "... You.. Want to hunt?" He pulled down his shirt and fixed it around his hips. "Alright... Well.. Why don't we bring Sam's laptop to him? It might be good for him to feel like he's useful and helpful" the thought of Sammy in the hospital was a little off-putting but then again, he hadn't seen his little brother in a couple days. He grabbed Sam's laptop bag, and threw a jacket on, and he sat on the beds, "get dressed then, we gotta find us a case". Many thoughts whirled through his head, but he did what he could to keep them at bay for the time being.

Castiel was already on his way to his bags of clothing before Dean even finished, trying to dismiss the look on the hunter's face. It was obvious Dean didn't approve, but Castiel felt worse than /blind/ without his angelic powers and extra senses. He had the know-how to defeat monsters and other supernatural creatures, he just needed to re-learn how to fight them as a human. "Yes. I /need/ to help people, Dean..." He told him quietly, dressing himself in dark blue jeans and a t-shirt. He even fished out one of the plaid over shirts and slid that on as well. "And I told you before, I wanted to be a hunter," He turned back to him and smiled ever so subtly with his eyes. On his way back toward Dean, Castiel swept Sam's laptop and charger off the table, tucking it under his arm as he stopped in front of him. Tilting his head curiously and staring down at him, Castiel pursed his lips a moment before speaking. "... Are you worried?"

Dean looked down at the floor at Castiel's inquiry, because, yes, he was very worried. Hunting wasn't a glorious career... Every one he knew died from hunting, and Sammy was on his death bed now. He went to hell for christ's sake, and Castiel wouldn't be able to save him again, and he would have Castiel to look out for now. Once the monsters start hearing about you your in danger, and if he lost Castiel for good... There's no saying what would happen to Dean. "Nah, it's alright, hun... Oh and by the way... Try to not mention anything about 'us' to Sam.. Just for now okay? " Sam wasn't ready for that sort of info, at least not while he needed to search a case for them. Sam needed things to be as 'normal' as possible...

Chewing on his lower lip for a moment, wanting to press for answers because Dean was clearly not telling the truth - or at least not all of it - he decided not to for now and let it drop with a sigh. Reaching up to stroke through Dean's hair gently, he bent down enough to kiss the top of his head, heart giving a little flutter as he did so. Dean was his boyfriend... No matter how many times he repeated that in his mind, it just seemed so surreal. "Yes Dean... I'll keep it secret." He promised, letting his hand drop away as he began moving toward the door to get his shoes.

They did the usual routine of driving to the hospital and walking up to Sam's room, but holding hands the whole time until just before they reached Sam's room door. Dean pressed a quick kiss to the hand interlaced with his before he let it go. And walked into the room. "Heyy, Sammy!" He greeted with a smile, handing him his laptop bag with his laptop inside it. He took the cord out for him and handed it to Cas so he could plug it in, without saying a word, seeing if Sammy would catch on.

Castiel was unusually happy, just from holding hands with Dean even in public. Walking through the many corridors in the hospital they recieved a number of looks, but it only made him more proud to be seen, and it sent blooms of warmth all through his chest... It was too bad they couldn't share the news with Sam, but as long as Dean wanted it witheld, Castiel wouldn't say a word to him about it. He was slightly disappointed when they had to let go of each other, and had to fight back from blushing at the kiss to the back of his hand, but the look on Sam's face upon their entry more than made up for it. He was /awake/... And while he was still thinner than usual, color was returning to his features and that familiar warm spark was in his eyes.

"I was just about to call you guys!" Sam beamed, promptly setting his phone down beside the bed and pulling himself to sit up straighter. "I- they think I'm starting to get better now... I was gonna share the news... I'm not gaining my weight back yet, but... I can breathe better," As soon as he saw the cord getting pulled out of the bag, Sam knew what was coming next. He grinned and patted his lap for Dean to set the laptop down on him. "It's about time you bring me some entertainment... I think I've gone through almost every magazine and book in this place... Did you hear about Miley Cyrus up on stage with what's his face the other week? God that was awful..."

Dean smiled, expression full of love for his brother, immensely happy to hear good news. "well.. We've been.. Keeping busy.. So I haven't heard much on anything." He gave a fleeting glance over at Castiel. "He still can't shave by himself, and here, he wants to learn how to hunt"

Castiel gave the laptop to Sam, plugging in the charger to it for him before taking a seat beside him. He certainly looked many times better than he did the last time they visited. And he was immensely pleased to have his laptop again, that much was clear from the way his eyes gleamed upon opening it up.

"So, I'm guessing you want me to look for a case, then?" It wasn't so much a question as it was a statement. Teaching Castiel to hunt was definitely a good idea... He needed to learn how to defend himself without his angel mojo... Sam would try and locate an easier case - just a typical salt and burn. Once he was situated well into hunting ghosts, they could move onto the 'bigger fish'. No vampires or demons for a little while yet. As the loading screen came up, and Sam punched in the password, he turned his gaze to Dean. "Also... If I find porn sites on my page history again, I swear I'll never let you access my laptop anymore. You guys can keep yourselves 'busy' in a different way that doesn't involve giving my computer viruses."

Dean threw his hands up in innocence, not wanting to say anything incase his words gave away he and Cas's status. "No faith" he teased, "but yeah if you can find us a small case to start with that'd be awesome" he said flat out, if Cas didn't like working on small cases first, too bad. Besides, maybe if Cas learned quickly .. He might 'reward' him.

Castiel cleared his throat perhaps a little awkwardly at Sam's comment, but his face betrayed nothing - his expression was unreadable. He and Dean hadn't been watching Pizza Man /anything/ on the little screen. They'd been... Otherwise occupied. And while he didn't like the sound of a 'small case', he wasn't about to complain. He trusted them to do what was best. And a small case still helped people - exactly what he needed to do.

"Yeah, I'm on it, Dean," Sam answered, not paying any heed to the way Castiel cleared his throat. He was busy hacking into the hospital wifi. "Thought you guys were going to bring me more home made pie next time you came." He teased. "It was really good last time... Better than this hospital crap," Sam mused aloud, pulling up a few different pages for local cases. Surprisingly there was a couple. "Here we are.. There's a haunting at an address not too far from here. It looks to be a museum or something... Typical salt and burn. Good enough for you guys?"

Dean nodded as he leaned over to look where the job was, quickly memorizing the address. He took another look at his brother, noting how healthy he really did look, forcing himself to believe there was hope for him. He reverted his eyes to Cas now, "ready to go?"

Castiel knew how to handle ghosts well enough, that he didn't have to worry much about running into many difficulties. With Dean by his side, chances of failure were minimal. "Yes, I am," he said to Dean, before standing up. Though he wanted something a little more challenging... This was a start. "I will have Dean remind me to bake another pie before we come over next," he promised Sam, patting his knee. He felt a little bad that he forgot today, but the decision to come and see Sam was last minute. He would be prepared next time.


	18. Coming soon

/ hello every one,

i just wanted to give my sincerest apologies as my partner was on Hiatus or a little while. She is back now and we are working on your new chapter. I love you all and thank you for being patient 3


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